As every year, the end of the year was the toughest time of the year for me. Had a psychosis attack, the worst since a long long time. I heard almost every word deformed in a negetive way against me. Still, I managed to survive the whole holiday without any conflicts and negative reactions towards others. What’s most important the days are going to get longer now, and I’m hoping for a succesful beginning of the year! This I wish for me and to all you here 
Happy New Year
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Happy New Year @lucius!
Your avatar reminds me of my companion the Shadow Man.
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well, it’s actually Slenderman Never had this type of hallucination, but I see that Shadow Man is a popular mirage among SZs
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Yea, he sends me messages through the radio. Sometimes good and soothing, sometimes bad and destructive. Shadow man is all black so I can’t discern a tie but the general feel of the photo is similar to shadow man. He’s been around for over ten years with me, but changed appearances in that time.
creepy! does he act the way he looks like?
Well he only actually appears now and then but he is usually lurking when he does.
He can send breezes out of nowhere in my closed up house to let me know he is near.
He implants thoughts in my head, we can communicate telepathically but I usually talk aloud to him. He doesn’t always respond, sometimes he just plays a song on the radio in response. And certain lyrics of songs will be louder to me and that’s him talking to me.
When I was severely psychotic in 2015 he possessed me and took over my body and thoughts. He used to implan thoughts a lot more then.
I asked where he was from once and the name Warsaw came straight into my head, that was him implanting the thought to answer me.
Warsaw 
my capital 
but no… it’s not where I am from
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Lots of coincidences this morning!
Do you have any new year’s resolutions?
I’d like to do my driving license finally, I didn’t have time (or the will) to do it earlier, and probably have children, but I treat it more as an obligation than what I truly wish for. and what are yours?
I want to get back in shape. I’m getting married this year. I’m going to eat mostly vegetarian.
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turtles are usually herbivores so I guess it shouldn’t be that hard congratulations about the wedding I guess I would faint if I’d have to stand in front of the altar in the church
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Oh no, we’re getting married in a donut shop! We’re traveling to America to get married! I live in Australia.
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a donut shop? in Vegas?
I also had a bad d.I.d attack due to holiday stress…I ended up in the yard with multiple neighbors holding me down…luckily all my really close neighbors know I have problems…if anyone else had found me in that state they would have called the cops…I’m non compliant when I black out…so a run in with the police during a black out could very well end in me being deemed as a threat…so best case I would be tazed and restrained and take a trip to the hospital…worst case I would be shot…they say I run at things and people not to do harm but add in…eyes rolled up in my skull…and yelling about the watchers and being lost…I could see a police man panic and shoot and it would be justified…
Sorry I haven’t talked about that situation to anyone but @moonbeam and not in great length so it turned into a rant…
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no, Portland Oregon! But we are going to Vegas for a couple of days on our trip.
We’re also going to San Francisco and LA.
We’ve never been to America before.
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is there anything special about that donut shop? why there then?
Uninvited opinion alert 
I can’t help but think it’s not a coincidence that many people from all over the world experience very similar if not the same “hallucinations”. It just makes me honestly wonder how much is real…
I have my companion, and other angels and demons that I see but that other people don’t see or experience. (That doesn’t mean they’re not real) But my husband, who does not have any MI, and I have both experienced what I have called a shadow man. My husband thinks it’s a ghost and thought maybe it is one of our deceased relatives. I think it could be a ghost but not anyone I know.
My husband said that he woke up one night and shadow man was standing over him next to the bed. I was mad and told shadow man that he had stepped over a boundary and was absolutely not allowed to do that or anything else intimidating. After that we didn’t see him for over a month. I felt bad. Anyway, he’s back and stays in the hallway like he’s supposed to.
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what’s a d.l.d attack?
I was cursed with… Sz PTSD anxiety and disassociate identity disorder symptoms…I black out…and wonder around screaming about watchers and being lost…repeating the same phrases over and over…with no recollection of the sometimes hours of this…I often wake back up in shorts with no shoes or shirt anywhere from the yard to a couple miles away…
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@lucius We saw it on a TV show called Man vs Food. I’ve never wanted to get married and especially never wanted a big wedding, but when I saw this donut shop in Portland does marriages, I said that’s the only way I’ll get married. So we decided to do it!
@Hedgehog I don’t think there’s anything wrong with you having Seraton and me having Shadow Man because lots of people who don’t have schizophrenia believe in guardian angels. It’s almost like the same thing only ours are more visible and have more of a tangible impact on our lives.
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