Encouraging words

Hey guys, I’m starting to feel the strain of being a stay-at-home parent. My social life has gone to basically zero and Mr. Star has been working mostly overnights so I haven’t seen him much.

On top of that, a relative has come forward to claim the kids, and now I have to start transitioning them into their new home. It breaks my heart, because we have all grown so close and I’ve seen them come such a long way from the terrified little kids who first came to live with me. It’s good for them though, because they will get to be with their older siblings. I just don’t want my family to be split up.

Foster care is certainly a roller coaster of emotions! If anyone has some words of encouragement or advice for me, I would love to hear them.



Im confused !

Didnt you just adopt the 2 babies ?

Such it seems is the nature of the roller coaster. You gave them a loving caring environment, and like you said they came a long way, it’s been your world taking care of them, and you’ve done an amazing job. The best to do now is keep it up until a decision is made. You had a positive impact in their lives, that’s something to be happy about


No, I’m a foster parent. I will eventually get to adopt kids in my care, but I have no idea who or when. It all depends on many factors.

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That’s sad. But you did a good job. They’ll probably always remember their auntie ninjastar.

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“We can’t let the fear of loving a child that might leave deter us; we must let the fear of a child never knowing our love drive us.” --Jason Johnson (from his book Reframing Foster Care).

It takes an amazing person to be a foster parent.


Did you completed the formalities of adopting a child by the Magistrate.

Will the kids have to move far away?

Maybe you can still do a lunch date every now and then?

God Bless you, as a carer, and I hope you’ll stay strong.

I know you will, you’re a strong woman.

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Although their departure is sad as you’ve grown to care for them, Know that you made a difference for those kids and loved them with all your heart.

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You did a great thing for those children. You should not forget that.

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Thanks guys. Mr. Star woke up early and took the kids for a couple hours while I visited a friend, and another friend is coming to visit tomorrow. I also took my PRN and it helped a lot. And thanks @anon17132524 for finding that letter. It was good to read.


You are doing a great thing! Not easy on the heart but you have made a good impact in their lives! :hugs:

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I think it takes more courage and love to foster than to adopt. tip my hat to both of you.


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fostering is short term and it can be hard saying good bye to the kids you care for but you have done your duty as a good person on this earth which counts for a lot, it would be nice to think that maybe when they grow up they might see you and say hello or even thank you for it, its a long shot but i can see that beng a nice thing to happen,

btw i heard that it would be extremely hard for a person with mental illness to foster or adopt, i’ve kind of given up on the idea, my place is too small anyway

Letting go is the hard part. You’ve given them all your love and care however temporarily. It will positively affect them however short for the rest of their lives. You did good. :two_hearts:


It wasn’t hard. I just needed a letter of recommendation from my therapist, along with relevant medical records.

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our process is strict here, you need to prove you can do it and go through background checks, you are trained and tested and its up to a panel to decide if you are good enough for the roles ( this is what i heard though)

I had to do all that too, but so does everyone. The only extra step I needed was a letter from my therapist. Everyone needs to do a background check, fingerprinting, and a home study, which is where they make sure your house is safe and then ask you really invasive personal questions that you don’t want to discuss with strangers. The interviewer actually asked Mr. Star, “So what was your biggest personal trauma, and how is it affecting you today?”

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that sounds very personal :confused:

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You did a good job @ninjastar.
I’m sorry your going through a rough time.

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