" Due to some of his personality traits he finds it hard to develop or sustain social relationships"

#asd #mentalillness [quote]" Due to some of his personality traits he finds it hard to develop or sustain social relationships"[/quote]

My main long term problem, re social interaction , difficulty grasping the ‘rules’ of social engagement/initiating conversations/making small talk .

The paranoia they have latched onto re ‘personality traits’ being a product of childhood/teenage bullying and peer rejection due to physical and social awkwardness.

When it comes to many mental health professionals you’re dealing with people who are a few slices short of a loaf.


I don’t know if I have social issues or if it’s chiefly that I don’t have good opportunities to socialise.

I was bullied for about 6-7 years. I was sent to a private catholic school as a kid. Those entitled little
■■■■■■■ s were worse.


The mental health system is a conveyer belt with the aim of sending you out the door. It is shameful. At least the old mental health institutions attempted to treat patients in a holistic way by giving everyone an occupation, group therapy and a place to belong. Nowadays, staff give you a pat on the back and a few hollow words of advice.

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Do you want to be institutionalized?

No, I was just saying mental health staff can be rude to patients instead of helpful.

I hated the psych ward, was treated subhuman there. I mean, apart from all the basic needs, they treated me like a parasite and constantly gossiped about everyone in there.

Might just depend on the hospital. Been in 5 times and there were group therapy classes all day at some. I never interacted with any nurses outside those sessions, and when I was pushed out the door I jumped for joy

Yeah, I can’t stand hospitalization. it has a lot to do with the fact that, except for one exception, none of my symptoms actually got any better except insomnia. The insomnia got better as a result of way too high dosages of ap’s, often clozaril.

I agree… especially since ‘care in the community’ is now the main go-to treatment rather than hospitalisation.

And it would probably be easier for me to get past the French border control than into a psych hospital lol. Not that I want to be in a hospital, but being in a community full of normal people who go to work every day doesn’t exactly make me feel great about myself either.


‘Care in the (ahem) Community’ was really about economics of austerity which began in the 80s. It was toted as a humane way of treating mentally ill patients in a community setting. In Spain, for example, buildings which had been a refuge for hundreds of years were duly dismantled and patients were dumped on the roadside with the hope that they would make their way in the world. A neat solution to save the taxpayer maybe, but poor old Jane and Jim doe had nowhere to go or call home anymore.

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I don’t know if @firemonkey would fancy the idea of a lifelong institutionalization. But I can see how a holistic approach under constant supervision could benefit people who lack some social savvy and personal initiative.

I personally advocate continuous learning and not let the day pass without doing something gratifying. Even in middle / old age, people can keep improving various aspects of their lives that they might feel unhappy with.
In my case, tackling a difficult problem often brings me more joy even if only partially solved, than trying to accept it and let it frustrate me every day.

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Not really. The problem is getting those charged with treating me to realise that the social relationship problems are due to the things I’ve mentioned , and that any personality traits are a result of a reaction to how people have responded to me due to those problems .
Those problems came first. The subsequent paranoia and social anxiety developed due to negative peer reactions to the physical and social awkwardness.

Unfortunately grasping that may be beyond the intellectual capabilities of many mental health professionals.

Yes, our brains are way more plastic and impressionable during childhood and teenage years, than later in life. Some early bad experiences can shape our personality profoundly and almost irrecoverably.
I had a happy life until university (19-24 yo) and that is, I suspect, the source of my current optimism and fighting spirt despite being faced with a terrible illness. I am aware that many people weren’t as lucky growing up / coming of age. Those people need more help, support, encouragement etc.

The problem is mental health professionals not being able to change their approach with the influx of additional/new information. A lot of this stems from a failure to listen and learn.

If I lived in your town I would try being your personal coach for a while :slight_smile: I am sure by working together as a team we could pinpoint the exact situations that trouble you most, and devise ways to improve your self esteem, social skills, executive functioning, and ultimately your wellbeing.
But I live thousands of miles away :roll_eyes: I can only offer you words of encouragement…

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Aren’t you splitting hairs a little here? Whether the personality problems, the social anxiety and the paranoia are a result of your social experiences due to autistic traits and NVLD, or whether they came first, isn’t what’s important. The important thing is that you can change your personality and recover from anxiety and paranoia, but you can’t change autism or NVLD, so if they are not unchangeable symptoms of autism and NVLD, you should try to change them no matter the cause. So does it really matter what they think is the cause, as long as you both agree that they’re not symptoms of autism or NVLD?

Im of the opinion that personality is 90% genetic

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I think the CIA/FBI/MI5/Secret Service should investigate the mental health system in my country and its employees.

What do you think they would find, @Jesspresso ?