Just got into a pretty intense yelling match with my mom— the first time I’ve really been angry or raised my voice in about 4 years.
I ordered some necessities for my new puppy from the leading online pet store (starts with a “C”)— a container to keep his dry food from going stale, two toys, two small bags of treats, a jacket, and a clicker trainer for obedience training. Pretty much everything was on sale, and it all came out to around $80– of which I used cash, not a credit card.
Brought the package into the house, excited to show the pup his new goodies. My mom started saying that my spending was out of control, that I have a problem, that I’m exhibiting a “manic pattern” and calling me irresponsible and stuff.
I explained that everything ordered was stuff my pup needed, and that no, I am not in fact manic at the moment.
She kept going and antagonizing me— literally sucking the joy out of watching an innocent puppy that didn’t ask for anything get some nice stuff.
I asked her repeatedly to please stop talking to me and to leave me alone.
Then my mom said, “If you don’t shape up, I’m gonna take all your stuff to your dad’s.”
She used to pull this card back when I was like, in middle and high school— saying she couldn’t handle me, and that she was calling my dad to come get me to live with him.
That’s when I lost it.
I yelled at her to not threaten me, told her I am not manic, and to seriously stop talking to me and to leave me alone, and that I did not want to yell at her in front of my puppy.
She kept going, so then I yelled at her to “fuuck off.”
I dunno.
I know what a few members here will say: “you live in your mother’s house— if you don’t like it, then find a way to leave.”
Yes. I know.
Wish it were that easy— I would have left a while ago.
Now I’m scared for my puppy.
Last time my dad came over, he said he brought something for my mom, myself, and the pup.
While looking at my puppy, he reached into his shorts pocket and pulled out a pair of small metal gardening scissors— sharp and pointy.
And then he was like, “haha, wait— not that,” and then pulled out 3 pieces of wrapped chocolate for the 3 of us, and was going to give my puppy chocolate of all things.
In case someone doesn’t know, chocolate is highly toxic to dogs.
Like, was this shiit a veiled threat towards my dog?
And now my mom’s essentially made it clear (as she has done many times in the past) that I’m a burden— therefore, by extension, my puppy has become one too.
I dunno what to do.
Have a therapy appointment on the 20th— will be the first one since my therapist went on maternity leave back in April.
Maybe she has ideas.
But I’m sorry, I just couldn’t hold in what happened until that appointment comes.
Thanks for reading 
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