i’m on ssdi disability and am preparing for a review. i wrote out an example of my typical day. does it sound like someone who should be approved for continuing benefits?
any comments or words of wisdom regarding this quote below or the review?
“my general approach to daily life is to keep my stress very low, my life semi-structured, and otherwise avoiding triggers of my illness. I wake up and to collect myself I breathe deep and relax from any pent up anxiety. throughout the day, i watch news or shows on tv. or, i go through facebook and random internet surfing. lots of calming music. i decide which to do based on what i’m able to do, lay on my bed with my laptop, lay for tv etc. i usually lay, because i have a problem standing and sitting. sometimes i am physically and mentally incapable of doing certain types of these things. i eat my meals. my medication makes me want to over eat so i have constant battles with that. i might go out to town to walk around. if i go to a restaurant or movie, for example, my ability to sit often doesn’t last long. i often have to pace in the building or go do laps on the side walk outside, because of my anxiety. i always keep my car in the back of my mind, because it’s a makeshift place for me to lay down if i need it, in the back seat, or to sit if there are no chairs around. i’ve also found it helps to walk a couple miles first if i need to sit for a couple hours, like watching a movie. sometimes walking doesn’t allow me enough to sit or stand still, or do something like watch a movie. daily walking has lessened the frequency that i go to the ER. one day without walking will leave me feeling explosively anxious. i need lots of free time because i need to walk a lot to be adequate. because of my physical anxiety, i cannot work in an office or sit down role. it is very hard for me to go to catholic mass with my family, because it involves a lot of standing and sitting still. if i socialize, most of my problems are that i have to pace around because i can’t sit or stand still. i also have to lay or sit, sometimes, in the middle of socializing. i try to keep most socializing with people i know, or going out in public when in the right mood, because strangers find my behavior odd. besides my inability to be still, i also suffer from being socially awkward in general. i dont socialize with strangers much but back when i tried more in the past, id overhear people talking about how weird i am or get strange looks. if i am around strangers, i try to keep my encounters brief, or find ways to get away if needed. when i’m not in town, i either use the treadmill or outside road as a place to work off anxiety problems or a manic attack. stressful events can trigger a manic attack and, again, i end up pacing around. for instance, going to the therapist half the time is too stimulating and i start becoming manic. (besides the mania, i also experience physical anxiety at the therapist… my therapist says i ‘have ants in my pants’, because i often can’t sit still or my legs bounce, or when i’m doing telephone appointments i have to pace and start panting and losing breath while talking… i have to walk for miles before the appointment to stay still, but even then there’s no guarantees) i usually have this therapist issue, and several other examples to tell the psychiatrist each time i see him of simple but stressful events triggering my mood. other examples are just things related to living life, dealing with cars, health insurance, taxes, rent and living arrangements, work etc. i dont think it’s wise or healthy for me to push my limitations by living a life full of potential triggers. and it wouldn’t be healthy for me to work more than a day or two per week, because of how it affects my mood/anxiety and sometimes psychosis. i sometimes hallucinate that my cell phone is making sounds that it really isn’t, or i hallucinate my father’s voice. sometimes these interfere with me working. (i have to ask co-workers if they hear the ringing that i’m hallucinating) sometimes i can’t distinguish between reality and hallucinations. (i might think my dad is talking when he isn’t, or i might think i’m hallucinating a cell phone noise when i’m really not, or i think it’s real when it really isn’t) stress makes these hallucinations worse. there are always delusional thoughts simmering in my mind to some degree. i also have a slew of intrusive thoughts that are like gibberish or outlandish thoughts. usually when it starts getting dark out, i have a panic attack, if i am to have one that day. see remarks section for more on that. before sleep, i try to take my medication at the same time everyday to keep my mood stable, because if i miss or am late in taking it, i feel manic and it gets progressively worse the longer i am not medicated. especially when manic, i fear staying up for days on end and ending up back in the state psych ward. i end up sleeping too much usually, or too little, irregular.”
im able to work 16 hours a week, and mostly suffer from an inability to sit and stand still. my schizo symptoms i’m afraid could get worse but are mild, along with same with my bipolar symptoms.