I’ve been on meds for over 20 years, since I was 14 so I don’t know. Sometimes I’m productive and sometimes I’m not.
A. Brain damage is not necessarily Must occur, although there can be a Deterioration in some ways, but not all of them have damage, for those who do, relative to the second and third episodes You can already see a descent, That’s what I understood from studies and lectures and what not… I have no decline but lazy when there is freedom,The first episode of hallucinations and delusion lasted seven years without treatment until the first hospitalization [three years]. But I’m fine, here I lead the class in terms of effort and work end I feel alive, everything is interesting, I do not have a second of boredom in life, even if im just spend time on the sofa all day,
maybe I’m stupid but I feel Luckily, because I’m crazy, that’s an interesting experience, look. For three years they pushed me like a horse because I was considered a problematic patient [once I managed to escape from the closed ward] 
You’ll probably understand that I have a wall built between me and the drugs
B. The doctors do not tel us everything, no one is sure what is really happening in the brain and why and from where, the drugs work but you can also give to a gorilla be a heart surgen, the destruction of the drugs is very great for the brain, and to me it sounds scary intervention without empirical information but experimental
It’s good, you’ve found the best way for you
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I’m going to use my Wikipedia quote again. Here’s what is written in the French Wikipedia page about antipsychotics:
“By reducing monoaminergic activity, neuroleptics (antipsychotics) decrease the intensity of emotions: fear, joy, anger, love, desire, combativity, others. They slow down the psyche, including imaginative and intuitive functions. […] Under neuroleptics, the facets of the patient’s personality can be altered.”
With antipsychotics, you could have less imagination.
But I’m not telling you to not take the medication. Maybe it’s better to be healthy and have less imagination than to be sick. But still it’s too bad that antipsychotics have such bad side effects.
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I find antipsychotics completely dull my mind, and get rid of my motivation. I hate them, but I know I need to be on them at this point.
I’m on abilify. It definitely short-circuits my creativity. Every AP I’ve taken does it.
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Mine don’t. Yet. Course I have symptoms when I get creative so maybe that’s the drugs not working at some points??
It will dampen your creative ability for sure and your sexuality.
This is the sad reality. Hopefully they’ll come out with better meds soon.
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