Do you hold yourself back because of too much of empathy?

Do you think you’re so empathic that you suffer from it?
Maybe it would be better to not give a f*** as much of?


Sometimes I lack empathy and become rude. I wish this didn’t happen.

1 Like

Yes. I deeply feel others pain


If majority of the people are more empathic than you then I wouldn’t put a coin there in my own experience.


I feel my mum’s struggle a lot. It actually can be distressing. I know she tries her best so i have no hate for her. her circumstances are difficult. I see a bit of myself in her so when i feel her suffering it actually scares me. not just because it is kind of disturbing to me, and very sad but also cos i kind of see a future me in her that idk how i would cope in that scenario

1 Like

When I was unmedicated I felt others’ pain on a deep level.

It was very rough, very taxing emotionally.

Since taking meds, I am still empathetic, but less so.

It’s weird.


Sorry to hear that. I also care about my mom in a massive way and she just were in a surgery because of the cancer. But I hope you keep yourself together as your mom would have more help from you if you remain strong.

1 Like

Thankyou. That is wise words

wishing your mum a good recovery :sunny:

1 Like

Thanks @anon51377248 same to you and your mom.

1 Like

More empathy doesn’t necessarily make you more kind and compassionate. We live in a culture that values empathy too much.

1 Like

Empathy is in a too big role for sure. I think it would make more sense to be a wisdom base empath than an emotional one.

1 Like

I think empathy is an amazing thing to have if you know how to transfer that into something constructive.

for oneself or and for others


Obviously. The point is it often isn’t, and often is used for the opposite. The worst psychopaths are the ones who have enough empathy to manipulate others well.

IMO, the people who claim to be empathic usually aren’t the ones who are the most compassionate.

But we don’t like to talk about this. We prefer talking about empathy over kindness and compassion. Feelings are useless if they are not acted upon.

1 Like

I can see how empathy can be a right pain. I have pain syaesthesia and my empathy for other’s pain causes me a pain in the testicles literally. It is noted that those with high levels of empathy are more likely to have this awkward synaethesia.

1 Like

what makes you say that? just curious :sunny:

1 Like

Because I think it’s usually (not always) used as a socially acceptable way of bragging about being good. Because you’re not actually saying you’ve done great humanitarian acts, it doesn’t come off as bragging, even though the implication is pretty much the same (because we equate empathy with being a good person).

You don’t often hear people who actually are exceptionally compassionate and kind brag about this or about being extraordinarily empathic. I think maybe because the motivation behind acts of compassion is rarely bragging rights. It’s intrinsically motivated. The only goal is compassion itself. And claiming to be compassionate is something that can be scrutinized, but a feeling such as empathy is not. So you can easily get away with bragging about it.

1 Like

There is a time and place for it.

When someone shares their struggles and gives me a real emotional brow beating sometimes I cry.

I’m often touched by the stories on here and the problems we share.

I don’t think that I’m held back by empathy, I’m just changed for it.

I chose to be an empathic person, and sometimes the world beats me back into apathy, but I still hold that emotions have a powerful force in teaching us lessons on an instinctual level that you wouldn’t find any other way.

The struggle is to know when to cut off your emotional attachments when problems won’t be solved when plights of suffering will know no balms. I think its cynical but necessary to live on and feel anything other then anger or sadness or hopelessness.

My empathy levels greatly increased after the crisis that led to my sz diagnosis two and a half years ago. I felt literally connected to every human being on the planet. I envisioned this link as a viscose fluid we all shared. Subsequently I did become a better person with my loved ones, but also riddled with guilt. That being said I’ve always shared the misgivings voiced by tree beard and partly at least for similar reasons. Prior to my illness I had scored very poorly in empathy tests - well below normal levels-- but had a very developed sense of duty and what you might call personal honour. Empathy plays no doubt an important role in our moral life, but if I were to witness someone being saved from drowning I wouldn’t readily conclude that the saviour acted the way he did because he was overcome with empathy but rather because he was driven to do the right and necessary thing. Morality is predicted less on received ideas of merit than on human need.

This topic was automatically closed 90 days after the last reply. New replies are no longer allowed.