Do you feel pathetic sometimes?

So ive been coming on my feet and becoming more aware of my current situation and I invisioned myself with worst negatives and depression I had in the past shopping for some expensive electronics and barely forming a sentence at barbers. I feel so cringe and pathetic about myself past. I feel that I looked or maybe still look like a sick dog who has to be to put down out of its misery

I feel pathetic all the time.

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with the negative symptoms, sometimes I make a silly smile, sometimes I giggle at the dull or nonsensical things, maybe it’s the extreme boredom of the Negative Symptoms

Every time I stand on the scale and it goes up a pound instead of down. Very deflating.

I feel apathetic all the time.

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