Do you ever forget your illness completely?

I don’t know who I am…am I me with sz or is it sz that is me

I think about it at least twice a day while I’m taking my pills. I think about suicide more often than the schizophrenia though. The schizophrenia I don’t have as much of an emotional reaction to as I used to though. But the things I did while psychotic and the fact that I’m like 8 years behind in college and feel like a failure which I attribute as the effects of unmedicated schizophrenia I think about a lot and it really gets me down.

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Now that you mention this post,
I might of like have a severe obsession surrounding my schizophrenia,
Like if my life consisted of moving a ball up or down a hill, a never ending thing that depends on my wellbeing of it all, but like in a all or nothing frabic of things.

Huh pure O maybe.

I think about it when I take my meds and when I get my injection. I also think about it when I have a visit with my psychiatrist, or case manager because they ask me how are my symptoms.
I think about it when I’m outside with my dog PJ waiting for him to use the bathroom
Even though I’m not sick, I constantly think about it or research it.

I’m gonna try, ill let you know in a year or sumn.

I’m going to get an sz tattoo. It’s going to be a horizontal line with an x below and another line … like:
__
X

But all connected so it looks like an hour glass or a stool

Yeah I regret the things I did under psychosis everyday as well. I dropped out of college and rely on social welfare and the support of my parents to survive. Its not the life I imagined or planned for myself. The only bright side is that I am stabilized on medications and am not having crazy delusions any more.

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Yeah I dropped out of college and am on SSI and living with my parents and am only stable on meds too. Because I stayed on the meds and prayed everyday I’ve managed to get back to another college and have a second chance at getting a job, but it still sucks

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It’s something I’m aware of. I’m aware that I can get crazy ideas that I shouldn’t carry out just like I’m aware I’m a man, I’m white, etc.

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Yeah it does but at least you are back in college and progressing slowly but surely. Personally, I can’t wait to go back to school!

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I hope you do well when you get back to college

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Ordinarily I am too busy living my life to dwell on having sz. Coming to this website makes me remember I have an illness which perhaps isn’t such a good thing, but on the other hand it is a safe space to talk about it in a reflective manner.

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I always think about it but much less than before. I had obsessive thoughts that gave me anxiety and low self-esteem.

Nope cause the depression keeps reminding me

Boy howdy I wish I could sometimes.

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Yes, I can go days without thinking of it

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It’s stuck in my head like a scratched gramophone record.

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