Or do you believe you were pushed and persuaded into this illness?
I sometimes believe that my illness is my fault.
I’m the school of thought that I was born with the propensity to become schizophrenic. LSD and pot just hastened the inivitable. I don’t think of it as my fault though certainly drugs didn’t help.
Totally my fault, but I was ignorant.
I abused the nootropic Piracetam because I saw some â– â– â– â– â– â– â– â– on the web saying it was safe.
I tend to think I was pushed and persuaded only because I don’t think my parents were aware of my failings. I was more “failyer” than my two siblings.
Stress and pot were involved in my case. But I think it was always on the cards
Oh, heck no! I was born different and my brain found the only way it could to survive.
Self-destructive, yes, but somehow more bearable than reality.
Some of my self destructiveness was part of a grieving process.
Ah don’t worry, when I was on death row, I met a man who had killed more than 100 men in man to man combat. May he rest in peace, Michael of the Mall, he started out as a security guard at a mall 1982. He lived to about 62 years of age. Euginia is still alive, she always hated Eugenics. What people don’t realize is that, he was sometimes released on a field trip as an agent of Central Intelligence. He once stopped a terrorist threat just outside of the San Jose museum of Technology, he sniffed a bomb threat and beat the hell out of some terrorist but he did not stomp him in front of our field trip. Matter of fact, he beat the daylight out of that fool and then yelled, “Somebody call an ambulance!” Our class wasn’t the only one on that field trip at the age of 11 years old.
What were you grieving, @PinCushion? That’s interesting.
I grieved that my parents weren’t stronger people and let me down.
My Dad was a idiot, no one was allowed to be smarter on any subject then him, he used to whip my naked ass with a leather belt and take away any self esteem, I often wonder if it was that that caused SZ
It could have been the cause. I think sz gets caused when we give up on people and your Dad gave you cause to give up.
Wow, that’s very insightful. I wouldn’t have thought of that. I wonder how you came to that conclusion.
@77nick77 I sometimes wonder, if I’d behaved better in high school if I would be better now. Though, it was a very terrible stressful year that actually pushed me over the edge.
I don’t think I created the illness but life didn’t kesh with my genes like it does for some other people.
Well, our life experiences before we became ill can surely affect our recovery later on. Just for the record, women tend to have a better prognosis than men. But there’s a lot of variables in who’s going to have a good recovery and who’s not.
I honestly am grateful for the way I have recovered. I was older (though still in the range for women) when it hit me. That first break cost me a job and was the strangest time of my life. But now I really feel like there are some benefits. I’m a much better, less judgmental friend/relative and I feel so much freer in life because I’m no longer concerned with there being a correct path.
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