Do they tell you to run away?

They always tell me to run away then they tell me where to go and i begin to obsess with survival out in the wild. I collect information on how to live out there if i were to finally snap and go into hiding. Very often i think about this giant hill called Nose Hill on the other side of the city, it used to be a ceremonial hill for my people at one point. They tell me to go there and build a wigwam to live in. Before that, they told me to go to the mountains and set up home there. I can get so convinced to do it that I’ll plan and get my things together but then my mind changes and i stay. But one of these days, i might just do it. They just want me to escape and isolate myself from people. Am i the only one who gets like this when it starts getting worse?


When I’m causing trouble and/or feeling overwhelmed, I have the impulse to leave everyone and everything and live homeless. I’ve had that impulse for as long as I can remember, but I’ve never done it.
Getting away from other people, and society in general, where I constantly struggle, is just a desire to be more free and in a place where expectations are low or none. No one can judge me or compare me or think there’s something wrong with me if I’m actually physically outside of all expectations.


I’m so glad it’s not just me <3

I had that when I was inpatients. I was going to escape the hospital…even tried but luckily failed. This was when my psychosis was still going on since I have just been admitted.

I have heard of several people who were told to run down the street stark naked.

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