Developing feelings for a woman pushes me to the edge

Knowing I could never form a relationship with her, because of my negative symptoms :me being asexual having nothing to say and extreme flat affect that turns off normal expressive ppl. Even having five min convo is like running a marathon to me

im sorry.

heres a question; are you upset about the woman or are you upset about what being unable to be with her represents (your limitations in general)?

whichever you think it is, i hope you can pull yourself back from the edge.

and come back stronger next time.

Maybe you mix an easy flirt relationship with lifelong commitment and having babies. It could be overwhelming.

I’m upset that even if I tried I could never be in a relationship with her because I’m so far away from being neurotypical. My flat affect, inability to hold convo, asexuality, and inability to be comfortable around people is an immovable obstacle that will make me die alone. I’m way too ‘bizarre’ , I don’t belong with the neurotypical human race

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I can’t even have easy relationship. I’m completely asexual and extreme flat effect that is an immediate turn off to others I can see it in their eyes. It’s torture

Of all the rotten things that have happened since my psychotic break, the inability to have a conversation is one of the worst. It doesn’t matter that I spent my whole life talking to other people because now I have absolutely nothing to say. It’s hard to meet people if you can’t talk to them, and it’s even harder to form a relationship with them if you can’t make that connection.

I feel your pain.

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It’s like there’s a blockage in my mind that makes convo unbearably hard when it’s so easy for others. How long have you had this issue for? Were u the complete opposite before?

Neurotypical people had their minds specifically designed to live in this world while those of us who are not neurotypical are not even fit to be in this world. Why should I have even been put on this Earth with this brain? My creator is a piece of scheiße

I am wouldn’t feel that way if I were you. You never know who will be understanding

I know what you’re talking about. Words just come so effortlessly out of other people’s mouths. Their speech is so natural. People will say things to me and it’s like my brain isn’t making any connections and I literally have no thoughts about what’s being said. This makes me anxious and self-conscious so that doesn’t improve the situation.

I’ve been like this for a couple of years now, beginning shortly after my psychotic break. Before that I was normal and could talk to and connect with other people quite naturally. I miss it and feel like I’m never going to make friends ever again. It’s really isolating.

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I’ve been like it for eight years. It also happened after but not during my psychosis. The few relationship s I’ve been with I would literally dread when it was time to call my partner on the phone because I already knew I had nothing to say and it would be awkward and cringy. I liked being with her but just had no desire or ability to really interact like a neurotypical would.i wish I could pay a normal person to write me a script everyday I could just read off just so I could meet people

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I am on generic fluphenazine and I have a sex drive again…you can too…don’t give up…work with your pdoc !!

Is that dopamine agonist? I’ve ordered cabergoline. My docs are not very helpful, all they wanna prescribe is anti depressants

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I have no idea…I just take them religiously…best med I’ve ever had.

Looks like it’s a agonist/ antagonist of dopamine. Was your low sex drive just from your meds or did it start before meds?

I know how it is. I truly feel brain damaged.

It’s so weird to have feelings I used to have just removed from my mind. And it sucks that schizophrenia spectrum illnesses strike so young in life. At least Alzheimer’s and dementia happen after you’ve lived your life

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