sometimes i have this feeling that i would be better off in a state hospital or something. i still have this desire to watch, like following politics or news of the day, and watching sports, but i dont always have a desire to live in the world and make my own way. if i had a tv, and could get some outside time in a hospital, it doesn’t seem like it would be that bad. and i would probably be well behaved in an institution and would appear to be one of the good patients, making me look better than in the real world. it’s just a thought. nothing to worry about as the world passes me by.
sometimes i feel like i’ve already lived enough, did alot of stuff, saw a lot of stuff. tried to work unsuccessfully and was unlucky in love.
I can’t participate in life because of my severe negative symptoms but I was participating before my first psychosis. My gf left me bcz I couldn’t work and because my empty life became boring to her. I was with her before my diagnosis beginning of 2011 until 2016. The relationship slowly degraded and faded since my diagnosis in late 2011.
I want to observe and not participate too. It’s common among us sz’s.
When I’m down I watch videos of people who fall down farther than me. A social comparison. Check this video out. Good things.
Lifer i felt as u are feeling now , years ago,pls fight this feeling .
we must be active and so many things yet to enjoy from life.
I also desire to be a spectator. I’m not good at participating
i know the feeling. i hate to blame sometimes but in this case it is staring at me.
stigma and prejudice make it too difficult for us to want to participate in life in any significant way.
this gets done to us on purpose.