Decided against making my own forum for birthmothers

I’ve been checking other forums and the general climate online about adoption.

It appears very black and white.

There are bitter birthmothers that feel manipulated by the system,

There are those in that manipulative system,

Many pro adoption religious people,

And people who have adopted.

They are all on totally different pages and I don’t believe one forum is going to work for all of them.

It would just be constant arguing and pregnant women wouldn’t get the help they need/deserve.

I never realized before I was in the middle of one,

But adoption is a very divisive issue.

Since I’ve been thinking about this forum, I’ve joined other forums and watched them totally collapse into fights and name calling, constantly.

I don’t want that.

But I do need support.

Any suggestions?


Create a private forum and join other forums and get to know people and ask them to join your forum. After a while rage quit or nice quit those forums, and then you have a nice group of people who privately talk with you and support each other on your forum. You are in control of your group.


We have an online AA group on Facebook. It has been working surprisingly well and the moderation tools are great.

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I just want to be able to meet all these birthmother’s needs,

But they come from such different backgrounds and opinions.

I don’t want my website to be a pile of bitchy women.

Maybe you’re right, @oolaloola, I may be able to pluck the more reasonable ones from their sites to mine.

We’ll see.

Most everyone is unreasonable, I’m learning.

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