Daughter/ Dad Stuff

So my daughter just started a new job as a cashier at a Drugstore.

It’s not working out too well for her, but she doesn’t want to be a quitter. I told her if it isn’t the right fit, follow your heart and look for something else…I won’t be disappointed in you.

She let out a huge sigh and gave me a big hug. She’s still only 17 and can try many different positions before she finds her niche. She’s a real little fashionista so we both agreed a clothing store sales clerk might be a better fix for her.

Bottom line, I took the pressure off of her. She’s still on medication for her eating disorder and anxiety and I felt she needed to hear my comforting words. My theory is you’re only a kid once…you’ve got your whole life to be an adult, so enjoy it to the max while you can.

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I won’t make the same mistakes my father made.

I’d quit jobs that I knew weren’t the right fit and he’d ride me for being a quitter…get really mad at me when I was younger.

Nope. My daughter will find her way eventually like I did, and I’ll be right beside her all of the way.

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Good job dad. Being supportive and loving is what you can do and sounds like you’ve got it under control.

I came from a house without a lot of money but my emotional needs were always met and it was never a problem! Keep on keeping on!

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My wife is old school and doesn’t believe in quitting anything…that you have to stick it out to the bitter end.

So Hon and I are at odds over this situation. But I intricately know my daughter’s abilities and sensitivities, so I’m backing her all of the way on this one.

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I guess the standard life lesson is ‘don’t be a quitter’.

But I’m teaching my daughter a more important life lesson, I feel. And that is…‘Never settle for less when you know you deserve more’.

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@Patrick I think that was great letting your daughter know that she came first and not the job!

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I think you are doing the right thing here, man. Don’t be a quitter can kind of a bad life lesson for someone with people-pleasing tendencies or social anxiety. You know your kid, and know when she needs encouragement vs help. Better to raise a woman who feels comfortable walking away from bad situations than someone who stays miserable and just accepts it.

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Mr. Star and I also butt heads over this topic on occasion, and I am pro-quitting because I know that staying in terrible jobs has caused most of my major breakdowns throughout the years. Through our talks, we decided a good way to decide when to encourage Starlet to stick with it, and when to support him quitting depends a lot on whether he made a commitment that affects other people, whether those people are being respectful and supportive of him to such a degree that he should return the favor, and how he talks about the stress. When he is mostly worried about the possibility of failure, we encourage him to stick with it, but if his stress is more like “I have no time, I feel like my head is melting, I’m completely miserable” then it’s time to talk about finding a better fit.

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It’s ok to quit jobs. I quit all three of my jobs because they weren’t right for me.

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Yes! This is great advice! I’m glad you’re supporting her

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I’ve learned that no job is worth losing the progress I’ve made in my mental health recovery. Good job in instilling the value of going after what she wants! I’m a firm believer that being miserable in a job we hate is the fastest way to lose precious time going after what we do want and what makes us happy. I see literally no point in it, short of times of desperation.

Supportive parents make me happy!

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