I’m dating a girl and at the beginning things were great. We had passion and connection but now I"m feeling that my heart is closed to her and to the world. We’re just dating but we call each other of love. It’s not congruent because we’re not in a relationship. We’re just dating and knowing each other. I already met her family amd they like me.
The thing is: I’m having some emotional issues because I’m dating her. I can’t express myself freely anymore. I feel I’m very stifled. She is sleeping beside me right now and I want to have a conversation with her. A conversation about our relationship.
I have some things to decide about my life yet. I’m discovering myself. I’m planning to start working at any job in order to have a better clarification of what my purpose is. I have also the limiting belief that, if I don’t have a purpose, I shouldn’t have a girlfriend. But I also think I should be okay with not having a purpose.
Most folk around here will kill to be in your position so let me get that out of the way quickly.
Relationships are hard if you don’t know yourself and what you want. It’s no point being half assed with things. You like this girl? Do you want to spend time with her? These things are easily answered.
Yeah it’s good to have goals…but don’t throw away what you have unless necessary and you have some new plans. For schizophrenia lonliness is probably the worse social symptom we have!
Be true to yourself and your friend! Figure out what you want and what you need and move from there. There’s no true/false rules here…but people do get upset!
Thanks, @macy! We have already known each other’s family, but we enjoy sex a lot. I like to know how she is doing and I care about her (even during sex I care about her). It’s not just about sex, but also about intimacy. What was driving me crazy was the ambiguity in our relationship. We treated each other as if in a relationship but we weren’t. Now things are clear because we had a conversation.
I think also that my emotional confusion wasn’t just about my relationship. I want to drop college in order to work (I don’t believe on college system). I was unsure if it was better to go to college, get good grades and go to work or just go work, invest on professional improvement (I want to work as a translator, so I would invest on English classes) and go for my objectives with no college.