Schizophrenia.com

Can't put my finger on it


#1

I really can’t put my finger on it, but I am feeling very affectionate today. I woke up feeling a little euphoric and it has just kept going.

I don’t know if the meds are in perfect balance, or if the stress of being finished with finals this quarter has lifted, or if just having the two toxic younger brothers somewhere far a way for a bit getting professional help… but I have been really affectionate.

I sort of freaked out my Mom and my Dad when I gave them both a huge hug after lunch and told them how much I love them and appreciate them.

This feeling started off little and it’s grown. I wonder if it will last until tomorrow.

Last time I felt this connected and into other people, I was rolling on E. But this is just happening. I just hope it’s a sign of healing and not part of the head circus.

I really think having finals over and having 75% less stress these past two days have helped cause this feeling. It’s weird feeling this. It taste like chocolate covered blackberries with a hint of crisp air.

I’ve not felt this in a long time, and definitely not naturally. But I like it…


#2

Sounds good to me. One of my biggest regrets in life is not telling my dad I loved him before he died.


#3

i got a lot of strange feelings in college ‘mostly connected to girls’ i get very attached to my friends and i guess i start obsessing a bit lol but it wasnt anything bad i think it was just a natural thing but i had it under control, after exams it was a relief but i was always let down by my mark, it was almost always the lowest score lol, i think it was down to my wording and memory skills.


#4

lol, perfect description. I :heart: blackberries but never had them chocolate covered. Sounds yummy!

I can assure you that your parents’ hearts were soaring :smiley:

I hope the good feelings continue for you!


#5

Thank you for that. I hope if you do try chocolate covered blackberries, you go for dark chocolate. Milk just hides the berry taste. Dark chocolate and blackberries really compliment each other. Try a shot of Blackberry flavor in your next mocha maybe.

Blackberries are very emotional for me. To some it’s just a blackberry. But they are quiet a source of healing and happiness for me. Even the tranquility vineyard in my head is a blackberry vineyard. I put way to much importance on the blackberry. If I ever made a family crest… the blackberry would have a dominate place.


#6

This is such an awesome post! Made my day. I always love to see people happy.


#7

Sounds like a great day. :smile:

It’s easy for people in general to let things go by on assumption. Our parents know we love them so often times we don’t tell them because it’s a given. But letting the people you love know it flat out from time to time is a wonderful thing.

My mother’s illness swiftly took her life but there was time for me to let her know just how much I loved her. I am eternally grateful for that.

As for blackberries, I love them. As a child, my siblings and I would pick wild blackberries in the fields behind my grandmother’s house. She would make pies and jams with them and they were delicious. Adding dark chocolate, well, I’m almost scared about how good that would taste. :smile:


#8

If only you could bottle and sell that feeling. You’d have lots of buyers.


#9

Blackberry cobbler is perhaps one of my favorite desserts. Not sure if cobbler is just a southern thing or not, but it sure is delicious.


#10

What you wrote is also why I love blackberries… it’s gentle summer afternoons, simple pleasures and fond memories. Homemade wild blackberry jam… You are a lucky man to have enjoyed that.

Now there is a variety that is prolific, and thornless.

There was an oak tree on my Aunt’s property that had a blackberry vine twine up and around it. We boys would dare each other to climb the tree to get the berries at the top.

To be up in that large tree in the cool shade on a hot summer afternoon with a view of the water and all those blackberries just arms reach… That was the best way to spend a day.