No kids no responsibility. Sleeping in the daytime. Not showering. Not cleaning my apartment. Not taking care of myself. At least I gave up drugs and alcohol.
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You managed to do something. 
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You did enough.
Don’t blame yourself.
You will do more,
in time.
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I’ve heard that when you have kids you start doing everything for their benefit. You get out of bed and take a hot shower because you want to take care of them. I’ve also heard people say that kids are over rated. Personally, I had some desire to have kids, but I never got around to it.
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I had trouble growing up when i was 17-21 as the schizophrenia was setting in. I still have trouble pushing myself to work full time which i think is more the medication fault. But i still work part time pay my bills and am a responsible adult. I quit drugs permanently at 18 but still use alcohol and tobacco on and off.
I believe it reflects maturity to not wake up in the middle of the night and have a cup of coffee.
I have kids, but I’m not grown up. They certainly don’t make me wake up and take a shower. It’s been over a week…
I wouldn’t drink coffee in the middle of the night though.
But, I couldn’t clean up to save my life.
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