Can we continue to live with what weve missed?

yeah, there are so many stories of people who sufferd. depression, toxicomania, schizophrenia… and then some others who continued their lifes, they ve never stopped to progress… how I am gonna to educate a child eventually if I want it one day whit all my sad past? whit all that I missed? like I said, its not nothing to have missed 13 years… I am one of the unique cases like this :cry:
its not so surprising that it will be hard to find someone who loves you when I cant even speak well anymore… all this silence from my mouth cause I don’t have a lot of ideas in my head… well, I am still in the system probably isn’t it? yeah…
the others seem not to care that they are dumb, they make with what they have, isn’t it? but what if my child is genius,hah? how ill gonna manage this? I have an extraordinary mother I see it now… she didn’t went crazy with me, believe me I am tough right now… but sometimes she takes klonopin because of all my problems and her life with my dad who was beating her :(…
so share pls, how to continue to live with all that Ive missed? I stopped developing myself and my knowledge etc etc. I am only relatively good in languages I think :slight_smile: