Can this worsen?

Hello, it took me a while to accept having paranoid schizophrenia. My aunt has schizophrenia, I dont know how bad, my family tries to avoid talking about it, and theytreat her like a disabled person. Absolutely wrong, bad choice on their part. They are unhealthy. My mother treats her like she is strange. So, of course, I developed a fear of having schizophrenia, as I started to develop more and more anxieties in the past year or two. I suffer from episodes, or attacks, where I am dead sure that I am talking outloud uncontrollably, and that my thoughts are spewing out of my mouth. Ive always had this kind of suspicion that people could read my thoughts, but when I was younger I would ignore that thought and remind myself it is because I am self conscious of my classmates judging me.

So, I don’t know how I will be able to tell my mother about this, without something terrible happening that doesnt help me. I do not want medication, or typical treatment. Many therapists that i see are TERRIBLE and I fear that this will NOT be takne lightly and Ill be forced to do things that make me more anxious. I just need to get help so that I can work out my anxieties and sotp having these heart attack inducing uncontrollable thoughts that cripple me and cause me to leave class often or to even sotp talking and hold my mouth down when im with friends.

Im seeig someone for depression, I fear telling her the truth. I havent told anybody. I thought this was a good place to connect to others. I fear my therapist will judge me and not take this calmly. She already tries to fight me on things I believe, and doesnt treat me like an adult.

I really fear it worsening. Not the specific thoughts out loud thoughts that I have SEVERAL TIMES accepted to be not true. ONLY to have them come back and when it happens,

I REALLY believe th ethoughts. I do. I need help in this aspect. Can I stop believing the thoughts? It seems uncontrollable, the most Ive done and im really impressed is that I calmed down and they went away but tis hard because of my fear of being ill causes the thoughts to loop endlessly. I wonder if anyone notices.

I fear having hallucinations. I think under the influence of marijuana I am likely to have these problems more also, so I do not consume anymore. Marijuana made me had my firs of these episodes. I should have stopped. But depression caused me to turn to a substance.

I get anxiety of how scayr it would be to hear a voice or see something. Its so backwards. I induce the schizphrenia onto myself. I had a fear of this and then developed it. Now I fear my fear will bring on my fear. Silly. Fear brings on a fear of itself, but I am working on accepting my health now, and breathing in trust and compeltely fogetting fear. Simply not having fear of my fear. Anyways, sound like anybody else? What can i do about my fear of this worsening into more severe symptoms? Stop having the fear sounds like a first. I am trying to currently remind myself I dont have that bad of a fear of this. Great. Im not helpng myself.

Welcome to the forums.

To answer your question from the subject line, “can this worsen?” – if you reject the standard treatment, the likelihood that your health will continue to degrade is quite high. Yes, things will probably get a lot worse. Also, the longer you resist conventional treatment, the poorer your prognosis becomes over the long term. Those who do best are those who embrace medication and then therapy early on.

This illness will twist your thinking up and cause you to form bad habits. The longer you leave things that way, the harder it is for you to recover from it. You may not recover from it completely.

Having schizophrenia today is not like having it 20 years ago. There are medications and treatments that can immensely improve your quality of life, but you won’t benefit from them if you don’t embrace them. Hoping you will do the right thing early on.

My 2 cents.



thought i would say hi.
take care :deciduous_tree:

If you do not feel safe telling your doctor, get another one. Pixel is right on this, but it`s also important to have a good doctor you can trust on your side.

Seems to be true a large %age of the time here. And probably the reason you seem to be so frightened of everyone who could help. (Well. If those who were supposed to help all our lives didn’t, what else would a child grow up thinking?)

But, will projecting what the family did – and what you think about it – onto all your potential rescuers get you where you want to go?

Try some bible study, in time you will feel much better!.
Kind Regards.

Looks like we have a new bible troll. (Sigh.)