When people found out I had a disorder they all turned me away, they all thought I was a “freak.”
@TorieRilistkryt People thought I was a freak without knowing a precise diagnose: the self-mumbling, the weird sense of humour, the fact that I can’t talk openly and I communicate in writing to be able to put through my thoughts, the fact that my face and my gestures always express the wrong emotions towards an event or person (even if I feel the correct emotions) the fact that I find it hard to establish personal connections with people and act weird when I’m in the proximity of people I don’t know, the total indifference regarding the stains on my shoes and the wearability of my jacket or the look of my hair even in a corporate environment, the open, even rude comments about anything that seems strange to me, the fact that I’d rather draw you something than spend my free time having a conversation with you, but I will go on and on sometimes about a subject that attracts my attention even though you are obviously not following my stream of thought or even of speech, the way I give more importance to small events that hardly affect me, more than I should, the shaking, screaming and terrified look if under medium pressure, the childish or manly behaviour when I’m relaxed… should I go on? Yeah, people have me figured out as a freak. That doesn’t mean they don’t love me, at least some of them. Maybe it’s your case, too?
This is exactly what I am thinking when some of my family members do this to me. They will get frustrated and tell me to go take my meds. I don’t get angry as much as I used to. I just start ignoring and avoiding them the more it happens. I hate it when family members talk about my meds. I can only really take it from my Mom and Dad who don’t ask if I took them, but will ask how I’m feeling on a certain combo or dose. Which is different.
You are right, it’s more their problem than mine. I don’t even think they say these things to me so they can intentionally hurt me. Both my brother and father have very narrow perspectives on mental illness. I should feel sorry for them, rather than get upset.
It’s not me, It’s them…
Due to the holidays, we all have family showing up that we don’t see all the time. The rude comments I get from family I used to think “What is wrong with me? How could they tell. What did I do to deserve that.”
But it’s not me… it’s them. My kid sis is battling anorexia. The same cousins who used to upset me actually started in on her now.
She didn’t say a word, she wasn’t whining. We were out to lunch and she managed to eat almost a quarter of the meal. This is a big thing. She didn’t go puke it up. But she did ask for the rest to be boxed up. That was when he started in. He told her that she’s just attention seeking by being so skinny and why doesn’t she just finish eating her sandwich. There were a lot of other very hurtful things said. But it made me see that those are the people who would pop off to anyone despite what’s going on in reality.
I don’t think you can tell on a person if he or she has sz if they are not talking to god or some other being or be afraid of things. When on meds, I don’t think I could point at a person and say they are sz. I don’t think mine shows either. Not atm.
Only thing I’ve experienced is that friends tell me I’m not sz. Either I’m too old to have it or that they think all s*it is because of tourette’s.
He told her that she’s just attention seeking by being so skinny
That is NOT nice. I suffered from Anorexia and I’m still in recovery, and being told that you’re just “attention seeking” is probably the lowest someone can get. I hope your sister is OK
I went through a manic phase where I would tell all my friends and aquaintences about my issues lol. Most of the time people would say they never thought I had schizoaffective, and that I seemed fine. It was nice of them not to judge me. I think people can tell I have schizophrenia because I can project it. So I started thinking, maybe everyone can tell but I just need to make it more about my personality. Like, oh I can tell she’s a little odd-but she’s an artist or eccentric, or she just has a vibrant presence. Most people probably can’t tell other than I’m a little spaced. They might think I have Autism etc. I know I don’t have Autism but oh well, it’s prob better they think that or just that I’m quirky.
That would be really upsetting what your cousins said to ur sis. If my cousins said that to my brother I would approach them about it. I understand how hard it is to approach people about comments though.
no. its a hidden thing we do not wear a shirt on ourselves that we are the S people. People say rude things about anything out of ordinary to them. Sometimes we are the rude ones to them or they are the rude ones to us when things dont match up in both worlds
ive corrected myself so much, i rise above rudeness or any other forms of nagativty. like a eagle hoffering above
It’s nice of you to think I handled it well. I didn’t. I wasn’t very nice to our cousin by the end of the meal. I got really rude and short tempered.
I’m sorry to hear that your fighting off anorexia too. May I ask you a question if it’s not too personal, and this is meant purely with the intent of understanding and helping my kid sis…
When she eats, her eyes dilate and she starts to get fidgety and then she HAS to burn it off. She can’t sit still. She gets a tiny bit hyper depending on what she ate. If you don’t mind me asking, have you ever had this reaction?
I did react like that towards eating when I was in the worst stages of anorexia and then when I first started recovery. I felt like my body was literally uncomfortable to have food in it, and since I had been trying to burn off everything I ate it was almost a reflex to start fidgeting. I wanted to get up and run to burn it off, or go and regurgitate it up or something. The fidgeting was also due to feeling anxious about how much I’d eaten; I felt like disgusting pig and was restless and distressed because I’d actually eaten food.
I would suggest that when she does this, you reassure her. Point out that it is alright to eat, people are meant to eat and that she doesn’t need to be uncomfortable or burn it off. Remind her that humans do need some calories to grow and function and that she doesn’t need to burn off everything.
I hope that helped
She’s in therapy, and she will be starting CBT in the second week of January. She’s been working hard here at home to eat a little. We have soup almost every night now. She’s on prenatal vitamins and they try to make her drink ensure.
Again if you don’t mind me asking and it’s not to personal, what helped you the most as far as getting out of some of the worst of it and start recovering?
To the question “what did you do today”?
I like to respond to family and acquaintances,
“If you would have participated, you would wouldn’t have to ask”
I don’t mind.
For me, the thing that got me out the worst of it was that I just wanted to be normal. I couldn’t handle the stress of always worrying about food, it was taking over my life and thought recovery is very hard and painful it was much easier once I stopped worrying as much.
That’s good that she’s eating a little, I really hope she’s OK.