Can marriage be based on other than love and money?

I want to marry but i dont want love. My ideal marriage is based on respect compassion and emotional support.

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Love and marriage, love and marriage
They go together like a horse and carriage

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If you want to marry, I invite you to do that.
The reasons of why people get married may differ;

It does not matter.

If you do want to marry you can do it with a clear conscience.

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Thanks for the reply. Conscience is important when you get married.

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I think respect is probably the most important part of marriage.

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Sure. Companionship. Someone who you like twice as much more than you hate them. Someone who you’re compatible with so you can share a (preferably) large home and talk and be company to each other.

Im thinking …dont you love your companion? Cause im never gonna love and my companion would expect love from me.

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In East Asian tradition, marriage is followed by children. Money & love are already assumed.

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Well, why do love and money need marriage? is it a threat that binds us together?

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Money helps keep things going well in a marriage, respect is needed to form trust

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No marriage for me. Marriage is full of crap. All I want is fun times, good memories, respect, consideration and most of all friendship. Don’t want a mate.

Looking for those long term friends to do everything with.

Companionship can be nice.

Why do you want to marry ?

cause you could have companionship respect etc from a female or male friend .

Could you marry a friend?

Maybe you will deny you love?

Some marry and do not have sex.
Hopefully that’s not for me.

They might have intimacy in other ways.

My man gives great cuddles and pec kiss on mouth and taste great and feels great cuddle I wondered that that might be enough to satisfy me.

I’ve not been getting jiggy as in no sex or not often anyway.

It is not nice if one partner cheats and the other one is faithful and does not get a sex life.

At least swingers both get some.

I do not want to be a swinger and I want a faithful man but if he is sexing others and I’m not then it’s not fair one gets sex n other doesn’t .

In sopranos the husband tony cheats on his mrs but she is faithful.
When she had chemistry with a guy I was hoping she would cheat and see how her husband likes that…

She’s probably like a perfect wife in views for some.

I might of cheated years and years ago when I was binge drinking etc
Not when I was sober but a one night thing when off rockers drunk.

Miracles can happen and people can improve themselves.

I’m sober now and do no such thing.

I think I am not ready to marry.
I am not clear about my x zzz and about other things.

My man tried to tell me not to buy things and said he would break up with me if I was vegan again …

He is a great leader with great ideas but I told him from the start I do not want him to be controlling of me and I do not want to be submissive in ways I said I am boss too.

I often do as he says cause he has good ideas but I do not want to lose myself and who I am.

My father who approved and likes my man said if he gets too controlling or abusive I have to leave him .

He said nice and calm I tell him if I want to buy a milk that he does not like them that is my right to do so.

I’m still not cool ok with my mans family and friends .

They are Christian family and I am not.

They sang some strange song before eating and are the type of people my mum warned me about in life.

My mum is not keen on religion or fanatic religious people trying to put their beliefs on to others .

They think they are superior to me and try bossing me about.

I do not agree with that nor am I ok with it.

They have been very bad behaved in spirit and slap my face in spirit.

I feel my cheek hurts after they slap me in spirit and I am not ok with being treated that way.

When I was really sick and had others in my body I slapped my own face to try and make them leave.

But I think I felt one of my brothers in my body a couple weeks ago and it was nice to feel him and he was in a good mood.

I wanted to marry my man n maybe I still do in some way but we would lose money of pension and I’m just not clear about several things.

I thought my man had spiritual sex with his x which is disrespectful to me and cheating and I thought he had that with his Scorpio he had too etc

But I think I trust him.

Hope you will find good companionship and be treated with respect.

I think marriage should include not just love and money, but so as respect and loyalty.

You could be honest on a dating site about what you want.

It’s better to be clear from the start I think.

I could not have a man with children I don’t think.

Family and friends is a problemo for me.

My man said he is a one woman man and does not cheat but I have thought he had spirit sex with his x and I just came home to find him with another woman sitting by the computer.

I need a faithful man!!!

Yesterday I wondered if he had sex with his podiatrist but then thought no I trust my man.

I want to marry .

And I want to marry him.

I think.

But there are problems and issues.

Quiet a lot of them but we do not really fight with each other as such.

I hope he appreciates me like I do him.

I was saying thank you for my great man every day but also thank you for my loved ones etc
Our food …

The woman here now slsobyhinks I am under her wing and that she is so cool which I don’t think she is.

I am not used to having people around at home specially ones who disrespect me and try bossing me about …

I was living by my self for years before I met my man and I was even sober and celibate.

My man does not seem happy to have me and might still be with his x in a way.

He has been snappy and crying and he says he just has something in his eyes but he was crying and why is it ptsd he could have or that his dads been sick or his x or a combination of things.

I want to marry but not sure if I can stand his friends and family and that just about every day someone comes here and they have been bad behaved and disrespectful to me and think they are better than me which they ain’t .

Might be better at knitting and firefiging but even if I’m a coward it still is not the case.

I don’t know if he loves me so much .

I do not like his friends and family but I love them in some way …

So I live my enemies.
That may suck.

If we break up I think I would leave the things I bought for his place like a freezer , flute , earth for garden etc

This woman here now is hateful and jealous.

I feel like drinking alcohol and smoking cigarettes.

A relapse but I will not do it but I want to badly in a way .

If both parties are concenting they could make a deal with what they want and don’t want with lawyer but they do not need to get married ?

Maybe just be partners helping each other out
Complimenting each other.

I think my bf might fake orgasms with me because I feel no Sp###
He also said someone else’s name when he was asleep :zzz:
We do not get jiggy often and when we do we do not look in each other’s eyes and that is a shame because it takes away intimacy.

I have the 65 rule. Whether or not I actually follow it exactly is to be discovered.

40 meets
20 dates
5 sexual relationships
1 long term relationships

That is 65 people to get to the one, and the only way to get to the one is after you know about all of the other 65 people before. You know how to act, talk, what to expect, how to prepare, everything. You even have yourself figured out in sexual sharing.

I tink if you think of the process as the 65 rule, then there’s no loss of steem. You keep things flowing, and you keep learning. You expect to lose the person, and carry on to the next on as a result. It develops an elasticity in you socially that is necessary in order to be able to keep the keeper socially who would not keep you otherwise, but by the time you are “to the one” that person is successful at the 65 rule too, and that is how that person can keep you too. So it is a mutual thing.

There is a rule in business: “The best business to begin in is any business.” That is true because when you are in business pursuits, it is nothing like when you are an employee. The two roles are completely different. So what the saying means exactly is that in order to become a successful business operator/owner you need to practice in any other business you can open. The reason why is because until you are on the stage, and acting the role as business owner/operator, you don’t know what to look for yet, but when you get experience, you know what to look for. And nowwwwww you can see what businesses are bad businesses, and you can see which ones are good ones, so now you don’t waste your time. You invest your time, energy, and money much differently, and that is how business success happens.

So in dating that is why the 65 rule is realistic. You should expect to lose more random meet and greets with complete stranger than dates, and the one is going to help you discover what’s worth it in the other. You should expect to lose more of the people you data than people you will coordinate sexy time with, and those people help you discover what is worth it in the other people.

And ultimately all of them should wind you up in a very successful long term relationship as well as for the other person your with the same way.

We are phenomena, and we gotta learn about ourselves, and I have found that the best way to learn about ourselves is to discover the rest of the world. When you do, you’ll listen to many people say everything except what you will find out about them and yourself included.

Then and only then can a person make a rational decision about long terms. Until then they are just groping in the dark at what they know not.

:slight_smile:

I like the 65 rule.

My system so far has been in a relationship after the first night together.

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Yes indeed. It can be based upon sex.