I’ve decided what I want to do with my life!
I’m going to move into IT at my work, become an expert in the IT field in like 10-20 years.
Then combine phlebotomy and IT. Like tech support for a Phlebotomy lab. 
Any laptop suggestions for PC?
Went in to work only to find out it was an on call shift. There was no way to tell. Better safe than sorry. Works going well, got drug and alcohol counseling tonight and a pdoc appt in a week. So far this new dose of medicine really does the trick.
Good to hear things are going well! The right meds and the right dose makes all the difference!
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It really does. I am still grappling with the fact that I am reliant on medicine. It’s a tough pill to swallow. But as long as medicine is effective and harmonious with me I’m happy.
I successfully implemented a healthcare plan for me and got it approved by my doctor. I am going back to the pills from the injection. 15mg / day of Abilify I can go up to 20mg in 10 days if I need it.
Wondering whether I should go train at this new place at my work to get more hours. They’re cutting my hours and idk why. I guess it could be because I left without telling a supervisor when I had a legitimate medical issue going on (inj wore off too soon). Anyway it’s in the past and now I know what to do. No one told me. I still disagree with their rules. I like the job though. Gets me outta the house and puts $$$ in my pocket.
update:
I am now training to be a lifeguard! I was a lifeguard before back in ‘10 at a Boy Scout Camp. I’m rusty now but I’ll get there.
My biggest hurdle I think will be grabbing the 10lb weight at 12 feet deep. I can go 8 feet deep so far, but I’m not super confident about it yet.
Any tips for lifeguarding? My class starts mid August. I think I can do two jobs too and get time off my other one for this one.
Happy Friday! 
Just an update:
So the lifeguarding hasn’t worked out yet, I have this new fear of diving underwater I want to defeat but I know I don’t have to. So back burner it is. I still like swimming though. It pushes me hard.
On the bright side I found out I can withdraw from my 401k I started in Seattle since I’m no longer part of the company. Over $1600 bucks! Either take it now or wait until age 65 and it would be $14000. But I really need it now. I needs a car!
I did a bunch of paperwork and chores today. It’s been productive. I am starting paperwork for disability benefits and a medical waiver for my student tuition. Disability application is a 4 month process I guess. And they want a ton of info. I got like over half way through it today though.
I’m feeling good about my work prospects. And in general. Aside from voices…$&@! I’m gonna talk to the networking gurus at my work today and see if I can shadow. Transitioning from my job as server. (Food service) Any tips @anon31257746? I know you are experienced in this area. Maybe I should pm you?
I bought a car! Now to figure out driving safely again
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How exciting for you! I bought a new-to-me car at the end of May. I had barely driven for four years prior, but the skills came right back. Enjoy it!
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Well, it’s been a while since my last update. Thought I’d check in.
I worked a 14 hour shift the other day. Whew that was draining. Got one day off today and trying just to rest. One step at a time, slowly. Cheers! 
Started a gym routine. Going Monday thru friday. Alternating leg and arm days. Taking protein and creatine. I would suggest it, it helps me focus on something and get my mind off of things. I’m going to add in cardio tomorrow. 
Biking to the gym and back. Might have to bundle up.
UPDATE:
A snippet from my journal. Enjoy.
12/11/19 12:31pm
I had a migraine or something yesterday at work. I had to go home and rest. I hope and pray it doesn’t happen again.
I think I’m a deep thinker. I’ve been thinking deeply for a while now and I’ve come to this conclusion. It’s just who i am. I’m proud of who I am today. I really get out there and get it done. Aside from my work permit holding me back haha. Oh well weekend approaches! Friendsgiving probably a happening for me at a friends.
My roommate and I talked about my medical history last night. I told him lots of info. I wanted this to happen, we sat down and I was honest with him. He told me some things too. It was a good heart to heart convo. I feel blessed to have such a good listener as my roommate. I go through troubling times sometimes, with my illness, so it’s nice at least to have someone hear you through.
I accept my schizoaffective disorder. I know it has been hard to come to terms with in the past but I need to see it for what it is. It means I need a little wiggle room on some cognitive and quality of life areas. Such as thinking. I should not interact with the voices, I should ignore them because they are not real. They also are very unfriendly sometimes, so I have no reason to trust them. Specific voices come through every now and then and I name them but even this is somewhat of an interaction. I suppose minimizing these interactions and focusing on my real, good social circles and family will help me the most. And God is great!
I want to read the Bible more. Maybe I will go do that now. Enough journaling for now. 
2:20 pm
I ended up eating breakfast and doing chores instead of reading the Bible. Perhaps tonight I will get to it. It’s really inspiring hearing His word in biblical parables. I’m gonna do my best to work today. Wish me luck! Peace.
9:00pm
I think I just overthink things. I also think I am susceptible to other illnesses because of my pre-existing condition. Like colds, flu, any ailments hit me like tenfold it seems. Maybe this is why I’m a health nut. Eating healthy, exercising, being careful about what I put into my body. I need to pay my school!
I am pro psychiatry. Although, I see where the anti-psychiatry movement comes from. No one wants to follow such strict orders and medicine regimen. But it [medicine] keeps me alive and happy.
Everything is connected. A healthy balance is necessary. Don’t do anything dumb. Honor God. Glorify Him. Be with friends and family as much as possible. “Nothing lasts forever, even cold November rain.”
A motto that applies to life well is “Be prepared.” This is also the Boy Scout motto. I loved Scouting.
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I feel at peace right now, I’m moved out and it’s cool. I believe I am symptom-free for the most part. Sometimes I notice curious voices in the background, or foreground even. But it doesn’t bother me. I accept my schizoaffective disorder for what it is. I think I am actually smarter from this condition. I’ve almost grown to like my illness. I know I still have a bunch of growing to do, but I have come so far. Some of you know where I have been, mentally maybe.
I think I do struggle with a little seasonal affective disorder too. I think everyone does though. The winter is gloomy and I just want to snuggle up inside usually. Just a message to anyone and everyone, emotion is normal, even sadness or anger. (Negative emotions) but of course we like positive emotions like happiness and joy. A healthy balance is our responsibility.
I started smoking weed around Christmastime. Now to keep this recovery-oriented, I believe it has helped me SOME, but not GREATLY. My psychiatrist thinks it doesn’t help me enough to be worth it. I talked to him about why I was smoking weed today. He said liking intoxication is not healthy, and I should reduce the THC content in what I smoke. And that eventually I’ll choke on the smoke and not like it, which is good. Weed of course affects everyone differently, so I would NOT recommend it until you check with your doctor. Even then, don’t smoke or drink and drive, and be aware it may affect your judgement. Just like alcohol. I have half a mind to get sober again, I really do. Any suggestions? I mean I like what I’m doing but I want to maximize my wellness.
I eat healthy, stay hydrated, and exercise. I was once a firefighter, which instilled within me a purpose to excel and help others. Helpers need help, too. Even I, and maybe many men, tend to push down emotions when we don’t have to. We can feel what we’re feeling, and express ourselves naturally. I guess this is a truthful, opening up phase I’m going through. Let’s open up, people. Of course off this forum I keep my medical history strictly private, but let’s examine our problems. Work through them. Write it down. How can I accomplish my honest desires? Then do it.
We can do this, guys. It’s not that bad. Smile. Respect the truth of others and of yourself. You deserve it. Pass it on. What goes around comes around. Be positive. You’re awesome.
Update:
Hopefully going to college in Spring term for Engineering! I’ll keep you posted.
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