My brother recently married and my close cousin married as well. I feel like the black sheep of the family. I hardly see my relatives anymore and have become a bit of a black sheep of the family. I’d like to turn it around and be more involved in their lives. What should I do? On the one hand, I’d like to be more involved and then there’s the other part of me that wants to segregate myself from them. I don’t do well in group settings, even with family; I ruminate on the time spent together and often times it will lead to suicidal ideations.
I know the adult thing to do is to suck it up and be a part of the family. The safety part in me tells me to retreat and to protect my well being. Any suggestions would be appreciated.