Damn, that’s harsh. People have no idea the things that can happen.
In the course that I’m taking it’s all about taoism and connection to the source of life, in a very spiritual way some classes. I don’t like it very much, but the rest is really scientific so there’s balance.
Some people want to see things, lol it’s beyond my comprehension.
[quote=“azteccelt, post:1, topic:35178”]
Do you believe in god?
If so, how do you define him/her/it/ or any scientific energy?
[/quote]1. I believe there is a God.
That’s the thing - I don’t define God anymore. Rather than try to create a paradigm in which I feel comfortable, I’ll let God do the talking or revealing. I don’t want to create inaccurate or false beliefs about God, so I simply remain silent on the matter.
[quote=“azteccelt, post:1, topic:35178”]
I used to be a hardcore Christian.
[/quote]Same here. I even started learning Hebrew & Greek to try and perfect my understanding of the Bible, but after much prayer & consideration I felt “informed” that I no longer had to study the Bible - that I had graduated from that experience and get to move on to a more subdued approach to spirituality & understanding.
[quote=“azteccelt, post:1, topic:35178”]
For the past seven years I’ve struggled with suicide attempts, alcohol addiction, and hospitalizations.
[/quote]I was hospitalized multiple times for NO good reason. In fact, not a single hospitalization should have even occurred - but because my antipsychotic drugs were causing tourettes like symptoms, I randomly would have police called on me & escorting me out. Shouting or yelling is a crime apparently.
I have no problems with suicidal idealation, though, but Haldol did cause some when I was on that. Also haven’t had any alcohol problems. The stuff reeks and tastes terrible, in my opinion.
I’m at the same spot you are spiritually. I still love the bible, but I look at it more as parables to live your life bye.
Thankfully I’ve been sober for about 8 months.
Keep seeking for the truth in all things. The Gnostics called it “gnosis” which I think means wisdom.
Thank you all for your kind and insightful responses. I hope you all feel very loved and blessed today! 
I believe in God but don’t necessarily believe in heaven. Heaven is a place on earth. Couldn’t imagine a place better than this. I feel God has a plan but not sure what… I try not to think about it…but the other day I said to my mom “do you like rush”…she says she doesn’t really know them…so I go to play Tom Sawyer and as I’m searching it 1/500 chance it comes on. These ■■■■ happens a lot. I have so many God winks just to remind me he’s real. Not sure gods purpose but I’m a big believer.
HAHA! That’s awesome! 
I don’t know if I believe in heaven and hell. But I do believe in an afterlife.
I have recently been learning the Hebrew language to study the Bible in its original chosen language by G-d. I was watching a video of a Rabbi talking about the creation and the alephbet or hebrew alphabet and he stated that when G-d first gave the spark of life to humans that’s when we learned to talk and communicate. Talking is a divine gift from the Lord.
Yeah I’m just not sure I’d want an afterlife. Eternal rest would be nice 
But I wanna live this life first.
Maybe there is an after life :\
but right now it doesnt sound that appealing, I just couldnt imagine a place above this one.
Maybe reincarnation would be cool…if life was less of a pain and a struggle. But I believe Earth to be the optimal place to live, especially in the times we’re living in. We’re in such an interesting times, for me to be born now and not any other time in history, as a human, seems strange to me.
I used to have the chosen one delusion, a God delusion. I haven’t gone back on that belief in God at all, but rather God making me struggle. But for what? I dunno yet.
I could envision myself living in a cabin in the woods. Jimi Hendrix and Janis Joplin would be my neighbors. Doing nothing all day except chatting with them and getting drunk. Waking up with no hangover. That’s my idea of heaven. No more meds or SZ. That’s my idea of “paradise”. i could do that eternally. Who knows, maybe Joplin and Hendrix personality sucks too…I don’t think so. Nah hendrix was a nice guy, we’d get along. But most people suck. i don’t like people besides my neighbor and my family.
Haha. Yeah for me heaven would be chiefin’ on a spliff with Bob Marley and not freaking out. Hahaha.
I thank God most people never felt the way I felt during my episode’s of agony and mental torture 
Yeahhh!!! I wish I could smoke weed the way I did when I first started…before the paranoia and anxiety came. Celebrities used to be such beautiful people, what happened?
I’m also a big fan of Tupac personally. All the good ones had to die so young.
Indeed Pedro27, I feel so bad sometimes for my family and friends always worrying about me. But I guess that’s what love is.
if there is a heaven is there a hell?
No kidding! I have a cool Tupac shirt I bought from Walmart. I’m also a big fan of Biggy, Nas, and Mf Doom.
i said to my dad one time, if anyone is in hell suffering for all entirnaty i don’t want to go to heaven, why create the universe if anyone has to suffer in hell ‘‘forever’’
Nas, J Dilla, Tupac are my 3 fav…biggie too but I don’t know how well we’d get along…I like eminem’s music but don’t like how he’s changed over the years.
I think J Dilla would be a cooool cat to chill with.
These guys all faced a ton of adversity. I think Hendrix is one of the most likeable person in history just because how humble he was and all he faced. And marley too.
Cool we have similar tastes in music.
That’s a theological question that baffles me.
I mean Judaism, from what I studied, takes a more ecumenical approach to this issue. They believe we all go through a cleansing process, not hell.
Of course what happens to horrible people like Hitler and Pal Pot.
In the end, I can’t comprehend a God that would damn a creation to eternity that he/she/it created.
Cool philosophy Pedro. Kudos for being an extremely deep thinker! 
to me my psychosis trips were hell, it was the very taste of hell lasting up to 6 weeks. i was mental crippled. i wouldnt wish it on any one or any thing that ever excisted