Been raped alot today

I’ve been getting sexually violated since I was 4. Now it happens and I cant even see the men assaulting me. Like a ghost raping your ■■■■■■■ and mouth and they beat me when I say to go away and that I’m a free man now. This stuff has been going on since 4. But now it’s happening 30 times a day roughly lately. I take domestic violence like a champ though I gotta admit.

I was abused physically and sexually for a long time and now it has taken over every aspect of my life. Like someone getting their jollies watching you die in a video it’s something I’m not wanting to be a part of. I avoid alot of stuff because I’ma combat vet. The thing I will avoid like the plague is a shovel…just bad memories.

What I’m going through, is there anyone else out there like that? Going through these things and it may actually be a trauma based mind control machine group that experiments on citizens and military? I’ve tried to hold my head high but this has been going on inside me since 2006. I’m losing alot of time, and I don’t think people consider how important that is because if you were healthy you should cherish it. I don’t think alot of people know that kids go through this and then are expected to grow up adjusted. They’re not.

I’m going to school for criminal justice even thought I’ve never had peace of mind or human rights since 2006. I’m trying my best to clean them out of a nasty agent infestation in their own wings of the building. I’m gonna piss gasoline on em. I’m am holding each assault, instance, rape, slander, I will lay it all out soon and they will be shown to have betrayed me since they nkew me. Nothing in these people is going to change, they’re unwilling to change. I have to change, I have to change everything about myself to get back on track and alive living for a real purpose. Like when I was working.

I feel that school isn’t enough yet it’s exhausting processing all these persons inside of me as well as keeping better study habits…it just seems that no one inside me truely resoects myself for who I am. I get alot of mistreatment by even some of my own, all they do is try to bring me down. I’m through with them and I don’t want to look back except to prosecute them.


Hey man, glad to see you’re still with us.

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@neveragain, I think you got lot on your mind and soul… Im sorry.
It just tide you up.
Some things you’ve said are your real life, and emotions and psyhological expirience are another.
Find major causes of your condition, I see people discuss with therapist, if you can afford…


Good to hear from you. What did you do during your break from the forum?

I’ve been going to school for criminal justice I’m pretty busy with it and I’m wondering if I can maintain under the conditions I’ve been put into. I don’t think I’ll ever be truely free, I believe I’ll be in this predicament forever because people cant keep to themselves or have some high and mighty attitude where I have to listen to them because I’m their kid or plaything or whatever they call myself now. I’m just really tired and I’m not making good gains in school and I’m confused as to how they would want to be this way when I’m trying to rebuild my life after what these same people did to me.

Same people, same perpetrators, same sex offenders, they’re all the same people of 2 decades of government sponsered mind control


Hey your post about being raped by the voices hit home with me

I also had an anal rape episode. What did yours feel like? I was half asleep when it happened. I felt pressure on my assshole. It felt good. I wasnt hearing voices at the tine but i believe it was sone kind of mind control where they can make you feel things

i get raped like hallucinations right beside my face grinning with like a feeling in my pen15 when at a bon fire, just provoking anger. also raped in dreams for like over 30 mins!

:roll_eyes: :roll_eyes: :roll_eyes: :roll_eyes:



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It’s incredibly painful. You cannot begin to understand how incredibly painful life gets as a sex trafficking victim.


Let me just say I cannot ever begin to imagine the havoc that has done to your mind. It could not have been easy in any case. I just hope you have the ability to heal. I’ve never experienced anything like this so I wouldn’t know what it’s like. I hope you can heal someday

Im sorry @neveragain
Just write, and I will read your every post…

@anon28145038 maybe if every one of your posts weren’t filled with your delusions that you actively encourage instead of trying to recover from it wouldn’t get flagged.

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None of that is real and you really need to have a med adjustment or something done that will help you. I’m sorry you deal with all of these delusions and delusional thinking.

Please seek better help. This is damaging your brain.


Thanks for the compassion, but it is definitely real. Just watch the news. It’s pedogate/pizzagate. Don’t know why they targeted me. Not saying all republicans are innocent but I prefer them. I was victimized and it’s definitely real.

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I’m sorry you are suffering from this. It’s really not real. You seem to grab onto all theories and fiction. It must be very scary. Please reach out for help. I wouldn’t lie to you, I have nothing to gain from lying. The only thing I gain from this is a good feeling if you do get help.

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I don’t doubt anything anymore after what I’ve experienced.

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What sort of therapist?

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