So I found myself in an awkward situation tonight. My powerlifting team was talking about going out to dinner on our facebook page so I went, but unlike the Killswitch Engage concert and dinner with a bunch of lifters just being themselves, it was like 4 lifters and their wives and family and stuff. I felt so “wtf am I doing here” but I made some small talk and it was OK.
I think being able to deal with awkward situations is a sign of being pretty good. I did hallucinate once, I hallucinated the team member sitting next to me say “what the ■■■■ are you doing here Maurice?” but whatever, a few hallucinations a day is 99% better than most of the things I hear being unreal like my status was a year ago.
Couple of my buddies are coming over any minute so I dont really give a ■■■■.
What do you guys do in awkward situations?
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I usually try to ride it out. I’ll become silent and wait for the other person to say something. I’ve mostly been on awkward dates.
I do get a look though. You can read it on my face.
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Schizos seem to talk about everything. I probably would have hallucinated to. I think it happened today at lunch for me.
I seem to do one of two things, switch on my class clown mode and access my vast joke data base, or I clam up. If there are kids, I’ll try and entertain the kids.
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thats good. I wish I knew more jokes, im not particularly hilarious (I was when I was a teenager) I think schizophrenia has changed the way I see the world. Not much is that funny, more like sad.
One word…skullfuck (Inside joke).
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I learned never to end a convo in an awkward silence. Leave on a good note. You just need social grace and manners to prevent awkward situations. When I call a person it’s short and sweet about business. Because when u drift into bad convo that becomes disgraceful. Clean and neat short and sweet. I used to talk with a person. For like 2 hrs on the phone then to realize yea i enjoyed talking but it was mostly about non sensical bs. Good luck grooming ur etiquette it takes years of failure and success.
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I take my smartphone and i try to txt people just to start conversation so that i will not be looking dumb and quiet. I think my anxiety plays role in those situations that i cant handle it.
Since I was in onset pretty young, I don’t think Sz killed my sense of humor. Besides, I have to admit, there was some very funny stuff I did when I was in onset and recovering.
I got into a slapping match with a 6-foot banana mascot on a street corner while my kid sis took all his buy one get one free coupons. Sure he kicked my butt, but I got free smoothies for over a month. 
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i beam out…nanoo nanoo…( things are more fun in my head anyway )
take care
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I just start blushing. It doesn’t work very well.
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