What I mean by this is sporadic… It’s like a few hours every now and then , While completely fine the rest of the time - maybe a bit of an insecurity hangover - But without a downward spiral
i used to get a few hours Every day but - i mean with normal behaviour and mental state in between - it’s more like every now and then now
I had it yesterday I feel like I shouldn’t talk about it
It’s so deeply personal, it’s just with my husband
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I’m going to struggle not to mention it in therapy because he would worry
but we talk about everything these days because therapy’s ben going well
and it’s always the best thing that has ever happened to me when It happens
just have a bit of an emotional hangover
I’m more worried he might not want to get physically close to me again if I tell him… keeping it from him seems like the only thing to do. I can’t say to him hugs make me psychotic but it’s all cool, can I ?
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Idk i think i might have a telepathy delusion
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since about 2 and a half years ago. this includes constant thought broadcasting. people communicating telepathically with me. acusatory and insulting. i don’t know how to tolerate it without drinking alcohol right now. i suppose it was happening like four years ago but i wasn’t as acutely aware. i could function like read the paper on the docks by the river in the morning. walk to the park. now i’m aware that everyone hears me read. people are forcibly communicating with me sometimes for months on end. went 35 years and there was only the occasional spirit. now it’s telepathy. i told the doctor i was hearing some voices and he upped my seroquel by 200 miligrams at night. don’t know what to do because it’s still there. if i can relax like i feel for about four hours in the morning they leave me alone. it’s as if the voices react to my tension and anxiety. they attack if i’m not relaxed mentally and physically.
it’s difficult to live this way. the risperdal put me back in touch with reality but now i’ve got this going on. now i’m moving iback into an apartment complex. smoking outdoors only. so many people. i lived here for seven months and people left me alone. i even made one friend who sometimes hungout at my place. it’s going to be stressful being in a community again. my current house is way off the road and i’ve gotten used to it again.
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Sometimes I think I hear the thoughts of someone near me—and it’s usually a critical voice. Or, I am afraid that by thinking of someone, I will telepathically link to them, or thought broadcast to them.
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I dunno if “telepathy delusion” and “functionally” can be used without some hesitation in the same sentence.
But I will say that when I experienced telepathy-type stuff and thought broadcasting, I was working 40ish hours a week in a bank.
Kinda taught me inadvertently to keep my shiit together— or at least internalize the immense fear I was feeling at the time.
Some how, some way, I was “semi-functional” when all this was going on— but it really, really messed with me, and I was just not “right,” psychologically-speaking.
I really sympathize with people who’ve experienced this stuff, and still continue to do so even while adhering to treatment.
It’s a pretty messed up thing.
Knock on wood I never get it again.
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yes. this started happening to me in the hospital. i would feel a strange feeling in my chest and there would be the person i was thinking of communicating with me. eventually thought other people controlled it but then it pretty much stopped. strangest stuff on earth i’ve been through in the past four or five years.
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i did end up talking about it in therapy xx
it’s a very good feeling to trust something so essential that has been private in my life to someone with whom im experiencing it
im not sure im comfortable talking about it on here
it feels like another ‘secret knowledge’ but it’s such a deep connection
the fact it’s not happening doesn’t ever seem to matter, it’s beautiful… like good psychosis
I’m not sure…I just soemtimes feel like I can communicate with people when they’re not around. It’s my main hallucination I would say.
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