Anyone ever experienced this?

DX'd - Other
1
  • Tightness in head area (not pressure, more like someone is squeezing my head, or cutting off circulation).
  • Feeling that I’m about to have an angry outburst, but only to do one specific thing (like randomly snap, lose control of my limbs, then punch through my laptop, or bunch the wall, or end up breaking my arm).
  • Constant feeling like something is tugging at or wringing my stomach
  • Constant feeling around my back like someone is constantly triggering the nerves there to have me shake and walk around like I’m effeminate and to constantly “lose it” and have my limbs start violently flailing around breaking everything around me
  • Constant feeling like I’m about to lose control (for no reason) and start breaking everything
  • Almost constant “hyper” feeling, but it’s not hyperness or anything pleasant, it’s closer to what’s described when they talk about the restlessness that’s a side-effect of certain medication. I can’t sit still, it’s like I’m about to start shaking, I get the immediate sense that I won’t be able to fall asleep, and the thoughts being pumped in go from severe and debilitating to maddening, and all they do is constantly try to ■■■■■■■■ away what’s happening, say they are trying to do something good and are trying to help me, and that it’s my fault this is happening, and that this is what I deserve.

And it all happens while I get the sense and the nudges like someone is forcing this all in to make me do these things to screw me over, get me in trouble, get revenge, be able to claim they were right, and to have me be exactly the stupidity they’ve always tried to say I am, all while pumping excuses into my head that they are somehow trying to help, or are doing a good thing, and that I deserve to get screwed over like this and while constantly pumping in ■■■■■■■■ and ■■■■■■■■ excuses to use as more reason why this is exactly what should be happening to me.

What did it end up being?

Also:

  • Massive weight loss (20-30lbs) in less than 3 months
  • Difficulty maintaining an erection
  • No longer able to ejaculate (nothing comes out)
  • Masterbation results in a weird tingly sensation, an immediate urge to climax, and more ■■■■■■■■ thoughts being pumped into my head
  • No libido
  • Masterbation isn’t pleasurable
  • Everytime I go to masterbate, there’s always some idiot ensuring ■■■■ is attached to it (“it’s because this person quit”), or ensuring that they can say they are the reason
  • Ejaculate comes out when I urinate
  • Constant burning in ■■■■■ area
  • Constant urge being pumped in to just rip my ■■■■■ off
  • Constant urge like someone is going to step in and rip it off, while saying more of the dumbest ■■■■, and giving more ■■■■■■■■ excuses to say there’s nothing wrong with what they’re doing, and that somehow this is exactly what should be happening to me
2

I am sorry you’re being pulled through this.

There is a lot going on in this list.

As far as feeling like I’m just going to loose control and lash out… I do get like that when I’m getting stressed. I do get restless. But it’s not as bad as it used to be.

My medication dose got switched up and the Seroquel got lowered, Latuda got added and eventually my little involuntary ticks started to go away.

Massive weight loss and constant burning in the ■■■■■ area… you should see a doc. I’m not trying to diagnose, but this sounds serious enough that I hope you get checked out. Last time I had burning in that area… I had a urinary tract infection. Painful. Suffered longer then I should have.

Got cleared up easily with some antibiotics.

I hope you feel better soon.

3

I also experience the urge to break things and go into a mad rage, and when I get this or when I get voices attacking me, I get tightness around my head. I get angry often, its probably due to the fact that I have Borderline Personality disorder as well as SZ, and I get angry about the silliest mistakes I make and things I do.
As for the ■■■■■ problems - I can’t say because I am a woman, but SurprisedJ is right - see the doctor.
Hope you feel better soon!

4

All people get the feeling of crushing and destroying things when they get angry or pissed off …normal or not…it’s kind of a instinctual reaction in all living beings.
And I guess there is something is bothering you and you can’t find it out, why don’t you try to find out what bugging you and try to solve it…when I get a feeling like that I usually try to find the cause…I think it’s the problem that you’re having with your reproductive system, it might be a side effect of some medication, stress that you can’t calm down, or an old memory that is re-emerging to the surface…I think you should check that out with a specialized doctor and see if there is a physical problem first, if not then you should see the psychological causes and deal with them…get well soon bach :smile: