Another world

My husband and I just watched the movie Spotlight. All those kids, all those people…I was sexually molested by a friend’s dad a number of times during first grade, so age seven. Anyway, during this movie I started thinking that I can’t believe there are people who made it through childhood without being abused at all. And then I thought about that there are also people who don’t have sz or any mental illness. How amazing that is to me. I almost asked my husband,“really, no one molested you at all when you were a kid?” But I didn’t. I just thought about what a different world they live in.


It seems to me that everybody has been molested these days. I imagine a lot of it is due to the fact that we are more likely to associate with other sz’s than other people. Talk about being in another world - I live in two of them. I live in the normal, everyday world, and I also live in a world of delusions which seem very real. If I told someone what I thought was really going on they would increase my med’s.


Indeed, sexual abuse changes everything for children, I also was sexually abused for several years by one of my mothers uncles who was a leader in the church, I have found thru the years that people I relate to a lot, I discover were also abused, my sister and I have an almost secret language because our older brother sexually abused her, when I learned my wife and I would have a child, I prayed and asked God please don’t let me have boys because of how I was treated so he gave us two beautiful girls. I wanted to be the best dad that I could be, something not given me as a kid


@Hedgehog I think I know the feeling. I lived in a quite deprived area full of paedophiles, alcoholics and bullies and I experienced a lot of it when I was a kid. But I thought it’s normal cause all the kids were in similar situation. Only since I moved out and went to quite posh high school I realized it’s not so normal after all… Since then I had a persistent feeling not fitting anywhere. Like the abnormality I grew up in was the only normality I knew. Hence I can’t really make friends with “normal” people…

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Not necessarily. If you can have a thought without acting on it that is proof the meds are doing their job at a manageable dose. A lot of us have to balance having some weird thoughts with being able to function. More meds would mean even fewer symptoms for me, but I’d be so tired I’d just be a lump sitting in the corner.


my mom was abused. she in turn abused me a little but mentally not sexually. I used to hate her til i found out what happened to her.

That’s what I was on the Haldol shot. God that drug is bad.

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