Another struggle day without the bf

DX'd - Other
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With my boyfriend back at work unfortunately my functioning while left alone at home has tanked. Today I struggled for hours to get out of bed, tried to play a game, instantly became overwhelmed and gave up, was stuck laying on the couch for a good while and then went back to bed. The only thing that got me moving again was when he called to check in on me and encouraged me to get up and do something. After a LOT of encouragement and pushing and me coming near tears I was finally able to get up and put the dishes away.

It just baffles me. How can I perform well at my challenging job and then be like this when at home? I am especially worried because shortly our work will be switching to 12 hour shifts, so I will only be working 3 days a week. That is even more days I will have off and will potentially be alone.

I want to be able to do fun things on my days off. I also want to be able to contribute to chores. I need to figure out how to manage this :confused:

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Maybe your job is just leaving you wasted?

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Maybe you need an external stimulus or people’s company in order to stay active? Are you alone at home?

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Get up. Get dressed and go to a coffee shop. This is probably easier said than done but maybe try that

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Work is more of a forced motivation. Home stuff is not. So finding a reason to do it that will make you want to is the harder part

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Would it help to put it into a schedule? One that breaks the tasks into manageable pieces, and spaces them out with time to rest inbetween?

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When I worked a very demanding job, I was too exhausted at the end of the day to do much else. Especially in nursing, all your tasks fall under the umbrella of “caretaking tasks.” When you get home from a day of caring for people, you don’t want to do even more care tasks. When I switched to administrative work, it was much easier to keep up with household chores, because I didn’t feel like I had already been doing similar things all day long.

What helped me at the time was picturing how appreciative my roommate would be when she came home and saw an empty sink or fresh cupcakes.

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I get up at the same time every day and have my routine. I think some routine is nice and will help.

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Do something fun then a chore. And do that again…

or just stay out of bed. all day. See what asks to be done. In small pieces.

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Regardless I need to find a way to be able to function and get necessary daily tasks done. Also, I find I am able to do these tasks fairly easily when my boyfriend is home on my weekends but if he isn’t it is very challenging. So I don’t think its just about being drained, part of it is dependence.

@Andrey yes I think that is very much the case for me, I waste away when I am alone. When my boyfriend isn’t there I’m the only person and its rough on me.

@Pikasaur I have tried so many times to make a schedule and ill make beautiful ones and then not follow through with them or get off track because I had a few stressful days

@Ninjastar that helps motivate me too, the thought of cheering up my bf and surprising him

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