Apparently it is from my PTSD. When I grew up, my Dad frequently expressed that he feared he was going to lose his temper and without meaning to kill one of us children.
Amanda is angry with me. It feels like my life is in grave danger.
J.
Yeah, “normal people” can be quite frightening to say the least. They are going the opposite of what we do. They are trying to be as crazy as possible while we are trying to be our version of normal. I had a friend/neighbor like that long ago. A violent drunk. Terrible temper, caught me by surprise on a deserted street while drunk late one night after we left a club. He went insane and tried to find out what I was hiding (my illness). Punched me in the mouth and fell down. While I was debating whether to kick him in the head he jumped up and proceeded to intimidate me. I just wanted to go home without him. I was willing to walk the 7 miles home by myself at 2:00 in the morning. He followed me…it didn’t end well. Anyway Jayster, I don’t know what to say: get mad back? Get prepared to call the cops?
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Hi Jayster,
Sorry you’re going through this. I’m afraid to say I’m the same with my dad. Maybe not PTSD, but he’s definitely had an impact on my social psychological interpretations, which I believe has led to most of my sz believes.
To get away from this though, I practice online with uncomfortable situations, then when I feel brave enough, in real life. For example, I’m psychologically allergic to people who talk nonsensicle/paranoid/warped nonsense from their ass, because my dad did just that, and still does it to this day. So on an online chat, when a discussion comes up where someone is doing that, my first reaction is to mentally erupt. Instead, I test different replies different times and see what kind of response I get out of them. Then I can guage what they really mean or what they’re really thinking. Then when I talk with my dad or hear him say something absolutely insane, because of the situations I’ve been in, I can know he really is insane, and I have nothing to fear.
I get scared by angry behavior. I’ll become very anxious and then withdraw.
But if it continues, or escalates, I start to become angry in return and put the person back in their place.
You definitely can’t let someone trigger your symptoms, or become emotionally or verbally abusive.
Blessings,
Anthony
I try to stay away from angry people. having rapid deep mood shifts, I can get upset or angry rather quickly when I am not doing so well - the meds and mindfulness, deep breathing helps. Anger is one thing, violence is another issue entirely
you must have had servere trauma when I hear mens rasied voices I think im goin got get a smack
im getting CBT for this soon. its nohin you’ve done wrong try and be gentle on yourself.
Jayster… Sorry you and your Dad had to go through this. I bet he hated that feeling in himself when he came back into his calm state.
It’s sort of scary to feel yourself tear away and all that adrenaline just comes swooshing up and there’s nothing you can do about it. You see yourself being off the hook but there is no way to stop it.
I feel so rotten and drained after and anger blast. I hate the taste of it. I try very hard to avoid angry people because it will amp me up too. Lately, when hit with someone else’s anger, I tend to float out of body and it just sticks in my head and I can’t get around it.
I also avoid angry people… even loud angry news casters seems to grate against my nerves.
Angry people frighten me too. My husband is a gentle man but when he gets angry it is terrifying to me because he shouts loud.
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I have no way of knowing how realistic your fear is, but it does sound like your past is feeding it.
Try yoga and meditation and breathing. Anger is an emotion and it’s useful in creating change. But many use it to control. Try to make peace with it if you can and if not, just try balancing activities. 
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