Anger and out of control

last night due to a lack of sleep I felt like I was evil I can be so negative at times sometimes
the neighbours were talking loudly ouside my window and I just shouted ■■■■ off not even that loudly but still I feel like out of control and horrible when im like that im scared of my own rage at times but its always when im over tired. sorry just ramblin

There is a lot of good that comes from ramblin… Like knowing that your not the only who get’s fed up with loud neighbors and your not alone in being afraid of that internal bottle of rage. I see that little bottle of rage in me sometimes and I am so afraid of the cork coming off. Before meds my rage was not in anyway constructive, helpful and all it did was scare the people I loved. So when I came back into my head, I felt horrid.

But you know, we have every right… just like everyone else not be kept up by loud neighbors. If they are doing normal stuff and are just loud people who don’t know their loud, you might have to get those flat earmuffs for sleeping…

They are flat and squishy and light. But if it’s just some dumb neighbors who decided to camp under your window and be loud, you have every right to say… “Hey, I’m trying to sleep, could you take it somewhere else?” We’re near the water so people want to hang on the point and have a beer and talk loud…

I’m actually nicer then my sister… She’ll turn on the sprinklers.

Come join us in the night then, seriously it’s wonderful, we get the entire planet to ourselves pretty much.

It’s magical at night, no one around.

suprized jay that just cracked me right up and thankyou for my lovely earmuffs they’ll keep my ears warm too nice to know im not alone in the anger stakes you feel such a prat after you’ve acted out in anger everything I own is black and red ill dye the ear muffs red just for the heel of it your sister sounds awesome by the way lol
pansdisease where you from sounds idyllic:)