What I’m more talking about is not the already accompanying relationship with a partner, but getting into relationships after the onset and multiple psychotic breaks. This is what I am fearing: that I won’t ever get into marriage with somebody. This would be catastrophic to me, both in terms of expected life quality, and ecclesiastical achievement.
My biggest hurdle to marriage is my unpredictable nature with schizophrenia. Meaning, the ubiquitous breaks we all get when either medication is stopped or not working properly. Keep in mind, I haven’t ever stopped treatment for my illness, but have had four psychotic episodes interweaving their way into my young adult life and causing many issues. And now, as I’m struggling yet again with symptoms, I fear this will be cyclical.
So what I really am looking for is hope, hope that it’s possible to marry with schizophrenia without ever having been in a relationship before. As many people with mental health issues can attest, there’s no conceivable way that hope can endure than without support from the outside.