I think that I obsess over my illness. How do I break the cycle? Why does it occur this way. I am so sick of fighting. How can I behave like I should. Who am I, even?
I feel same sometimes but lately made improvements
Positive affirmations
Mostly itās a case of getting caught up in life and thatās the distraction sometimes. From a few comments you made awhile ago I thought you might benefit for doing more for yourself. I hope you donāt take that the wrong way. Itās just that youāre so much more then just a mum and a wife. So probably start with the basicsā¦
Self-esteem and self-assertiveness courses are a good place to start. Are some symptom management and medication management courses that I found very helpful and recommend them also. Wrap ( wellness action recovery plan) course are also very popular. You will mostly likely get most to all of those courses at something like Nami and possibly for free. Iām not in the US so no idea. But the courses I did where based on US programs.
I understand where you are coming from, but, I am not ready to do things for me. I panic when I am away from my children. I enjoy being a mom and wife. It is the job I chose! None of it was thrust upon me. While the other kids wanted to be doctors and lawyers, I wanted to be a housewife.
I over-think my illness sometimes too. Itās easy to get caught up in analyzing every aspect of it. I guess Iām hoping to stumble upon some grand revelation thatāll unravel it all. In the end it just drains me. I try to avoid dwelling on it these days and just go with the flow.
You need to find something that is bigger than this illness,
Something that will take your attention off of it,
Something that is so big that anything that happens to you doesnt matter.
Hope this helps x
New puppies help!
Iāve been in weeks worth of Psychosis not knowing what is real. I went to the va for two days and started talking about training and war trauma and I was branded not a veteran but as a:
(delusional person)
I wanted to tell the doctor to get the hell out of my room. I left after the experience. No one believes my story and could care less about what I need to help myself and others. Iām having a hard time talking to people, and theyāre really just wearing me out with the same old things I canāt fix instead of helping collaborate and find a way that works and lets me have my freedom.
Iām trying and I havenāt drank today.
Just for today I did a 45 minute stretching and breathing session
Iām not giving up. Iām a warrior deep down and very resilient. I will not just shrivel up and I canāt give the voices an inch no matter who they are.
THIS IS MY BRAIN
THIS IS ME AND I WON"T LET YOU WIN.
(thatās for my voices watching me, maybe the NSA too lol)
Patrick
I want to ālikeā your post, but, find myself out of likesā¦
Not me lol. fifteen characters
Thatās a good place to be. And those are not the words of someone āillā¦ā
So maybe you could use that to combat this?
What I find (and have seen in some others) is if you think yourself ill you will be ill. The power of words and thought are immense!
Itās like the thing with AAā¦where they call alcoholism a disease and want you to say you are an alcoholic even years after you took your last drink. Itās a mind game: the power of thought being continually driven into you that you are sick and you are always an alcoholic. Simply not true.
Itās not that there are no symptoms, but these can be worked through and worked with more than people think. But to believe ones self perpetually ill or sick or having a disease is not a good place to be.
I am well and i will do ok. that doesnāt mean there wonāt be occasional pitfalls, but when one falls they need to simply get back up and carry on. Donāt stay down. Too many people stay down.
if someone is going to be āsickā then they should only be sick of being sick.
If there is anything I really want to ālikeā today, itās your post. I know I need to just go about my business. I can do this!
Keep up the fire!
āLikeā 15 charactersā¦