A very new set of complications

I’m fairly young, younger than I know a lot of you may be…but I feel very alone. A few weeks ago … something inside of my head changed … I’ve been having problems since December… But everything has escalated so quickly.
It started … I convinced myself that everyone hates me … I could live with that… But I know that they’re talking about me … I know that they are thinking about hurting me … Laughing at me. It makes me angry at myself … I took a long drive the other day… My thoughts were racing … I saw a few unfamiliar people in the park … I knew they were looking at me … I knew they were thinking bad things about me … That was the first time I felt defensive … As if I wanted to hurt them … To make them stop. I can’t think straight a lot. I think and think but my mind can’t understand what I’m thinking about. I can’t sleep and it’s making things worse … When I slept the last time … I had these vivid dreams of hurting myself … In my dream there was a man who climbed inside of my head wounds and lived in there… I don’t want to hurt myself … And I don’t want to hurt anyone … I know I don’t want to … But I start panicking and I feel like I lose control of myself … I’m in the process of getting help … I’m trying to make it through the last week of my classes without having to be admitted … It’s all so embarrassing because my family is heavily evolved in my life considering my age. I just needed some sort of a support group … I don’t know if I suffer from schitzophrenia … I’m not sure. I just need to hear from someone who suffers from similar issues… I don’t want to feel alone…

Each persons experiences are different no mater what your diagnosis is. Definitely see a psychiatrist or at the least see a general practitioner as soon as you can. In the meantime remember to breathe it will help.

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Are you actually diagnosed with something? If not see your doctor, chances are you won’t end up in hospital. If you leave it go and don’t see a doctor you could end up harming yourself or worse.

I have not been diagnosed with anything. I’m trying to hold in there until my appointment next week … Things have been bad lately.

Get yourself to a doctor ASAP. It sounds like you’re becoming psychotic, and that can end up killing you basically. You may or may not have to stay in hospital for a while, but being in hospital is no big deal.