Even with my meds I still stress. When feeling emotions of despair anguish, it seems like time passes much slower with those. Blissful feelings don’t last long enough neither are they solid. Like fleeting imagination of a place where your mind once dwell. If you believe in presentism, the present has always existed the past and future do not.
I also thought of Solipsism a philosophical theory which states that nothing can be verified except the existence of one’s own mind. It’s impossible to verify the existence of anything except your own consciousness.
I believe in parallel universes. Like our universe is just a bubble floating in the tranquil sea of infinite amount of bubble universes.
Why out of all infinite possibilities am I a person with SZ? You know, I could of been anything else. But I guess you have to live out your existence, and if, there is a next time maybe you will be granted more luck. Or less luck.
Come to think of it I am very glad to be SZ, in a modern age of medication. If I were less fortunate I would of been born with SZ during the witch trial era. And I would of burned.