I slept horribly and still went to work.
I did the laundry.
I feel stable. A bit tired and sad, but not fearful or paranoid at all. Just connected to my realistic feelings.
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En route to a goth concert
Great vegan meal
Havent farted in public yet this evening
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Toughie todayā¦
- RT 9/28
- group
- Pdoc appointment.
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- Went for a drive with my mental health worker
- My adult son came by for a nice visit
- My kids got dropped off here to work on homework. Their dad doesnāt have internet
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- I slept late, and it felt wonderful.
- I got to hang out with my sister and brother-in-law.
- My sister gave me $45, to get me through until payday.
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All sorts of good stuff!
- Psychosis feels really far away right now. It still fluctuates, but I slowly seem to get more resilient lately. My delusional ideas seem to often be so far away and unlogical now, and I have such normal things in my life (work, family, friends, son) that I feel veryā¦normalā¦ at times.
- I achieved something very tiny, but happy, at work today. Volunteers in our organisation get a Christmas present from the organisation, just like the employees, but āmyā volunteers, who are clients who also volunteer for us, donāt normally get a Christmas present. I found this unfair and easily convinced my boss today that they should get one. So we will have a nice afternoon celebration for āmyā volunteers with drinks and snacks and I can hand over all their Christmas presents at that time, which is a fun job. They are a group of people for whom a small gesture like that really counts.
- I volunteer for the last time today and will take some sweets to celebrate my last day. Itās a bit sad, but will give me more peace and rest.
- I will go out with a friend tonight. (Sorry, thatās 4!).
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- Got my bloodwork done
- Got my kids to the dentist and my ex husband covered more than half
- Just sitting down to watch my hockey game
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- Slept well, woke up feeling refreshed.
- Had a good night of teaching, talked human biology in lecture and gave an exam in lab.
- Had uneventful commutes.
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- Last day of work today for the week.
- I sleep better and schedule meds better since starting a routine.
- I think Iāll prolly lose a ton of weight before the month is up.
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We recycled cans and bottles and made $190 by doing so.
We will use that money to buy fresh fruit
To have at Christmas time.
We did great grocery shopping today and bought beautiful delights to eat.
In Sweden they (the voices )used to say I do not deserve food because I donāt work but there hateful vibes chased me away so I could not do groceries and then they say Iām sick and need someone to shop for me.
It seems hipocritical.
Thankfully i donāt get such nastiness as I used to and if I do I do not agree .
Also had my car serviced.
I love my loved ones and i had nice fruit for lunch and there are lots of positive things that have happened.
Love 
to you guyzzz yo!!!
Wish good nourishing healing food for you guys too.
We got some bargains and it is so nice having good food in the fridge.
The last psych ward I was in had really nice food so thankfully some (or lots) made that so.
It can help and bring joy with nice food.
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Havenāt smoked in 3 days
At gym
Been happy and stable
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Had a good talk with my son at the child psychologist. Wanted to speak to him about my illness, how that is for him and what he can do if i am unwell. My son is a happy child, he is content with the current situation and that was also clear from our talk (situation: no dad, living with grandparents, seeing me regularly, but not if i am unwell).
Had healthy dinner with dad and son.
Sent a mail that i found scary to send.
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Yesterday was my day off.
Woke up feeling well rested.
Cleaned up, shaved my head, took a cold shower and put on some nice clothes.
Went to Barnes and Noble and read almost 40 pages in a book.
Hung out with a friend of mine and ate some food.
Came home went to sleep.
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- RT 11/28.
- Made 2 batches of cornbread. One to give to my MIL.
- Still feeling good about giving a homeless man my nice gloves yesterday. But then at the same time i feel guilty for feeling good about my deed.
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had coffee with friends
spoke at an Action group meeting
resting now, possible coffee with friends again lol
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Relaxed day at work.
Bought a nice postcard to send to a friend.
Have the afternoon and evening together with my son, weāll sleep together at my parents house, while they are away. This feels nice, we are not normally together in the evenings/nights. I like that I can put him to bed, say an evening prayer, read a story and tomorrow we can have breakfast and sit in our pyamas. Sounds so normal, is so special.
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Meh. I feel sad and grumpy today. But:
- No psychosis.
- Went to see sinterklaas with my son (our local old bearded guy bringing presents to children, instead of santa).
- Listening to calming music.
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- I just had fries
- Took a walk today, the air was nice and crisp
- Spent some time with a good friend
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- Iām thankful my teeth got pulled even though Iām in pain.
- My son is here studying for his class one truckers license. Itās nice when he is here.
- There is no games on tonight so I think Iāll catch up on Hells Kitchen.
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