12/25/13 January



Sunday, January 12, 2014
2:59 PM

1:10 am Christmas morning

I am hallucinating more than usual tonight/this morning;
and my anxiety is exceptionally high as well.

I am hearing footsteps above me.
I am hearing rustling in my room and I heard
my doorknob move, as if someone was about to walk in.

I am seeing the shadows of stationary objects move.
I can see the air as if there is thick gas in
my room or visible heat coming from asphalt on a
hot day.

I am only afraid of my own imagination.

My imagination is saying my name.
Mom said: Shadow people don’t exist.
Ghosts can’t hurt you unless you let them.

They don’t have to exist to me.

My breath does not echo.
No one is walking around upstairs.
No one is saying my name and
I am not stepping on anything;
there is nothing under my right foot.
Shadows do not grow arms and fingers and try to touch me.
There are no visible waves or gas in the air.
Air is invisible.

My brain is lying to me.

My eyes and ears are lying to me.