Hi again. I’m a guy. It’s hard to explain what kind of intrusive thoughts I get. Lets just say that the mind gets out of control.
I think zyprexa is actually known to reduce both good and bad emotions, like you don’t feel the spikes, that might be why your doctor put you on them in the first place if you are experiencing mood swings. So considering that I would be very careful quitting. In theory you should get more mood swings off zyprexa than on. All antipsychotics are bad, and most that are put on them have tried to quit at some point, but it’s not easy. A lot of people who are diagnosed with mental illness need the medications to function, it’s the only option.
If I thought I could make it without meds I would quit today. But I know I need them. Maybe not forever, but at least for the time being.
Please take your medication again if your emotions get out of control. Taking antipsychotics is not the end of the world. And 2.5mg is the minimum operating dose of zyprexa. There are people on here that have taken like 30-40mg each day if you can imagine. Or you could ask your doctor for another medication. The main thing is that you stay stable.
You survived so long with this illness. How you managed it its miracle. It will be 3 years since my illness started. Before I had nice life. I have still problem to accept it. Did you have it difficult to accept it?The problem is I have a lot of symptoms and mood swings. I find people who have halucinations and hear voices coping better as they often do not have mood symptoms. I have friend who has paranoid schizophrenia and he is very good on meds and he is very happy and positive about life. Because of my mood swings and racing thoughts I sometimes think of suicide. Iam reducing olanzapine. I feel ok, but I start to feel Iam more sensitive. People talk about something and I feel like crying. Iam originaly from Slovakia moved to my BF to Hungary and I do not have good psychiater. In Slovakia psychiater who was treating me before does not want to treat me any more. In Hungary I did not find anybody, but I got contact for few psychiatrists. I also wish I found good medicine, but Iam scared there is nothing for me. All antipsychotics have side effects. You are lucky you feel good now. I tried rispen, abilify, quentiapine from antipsychotics. From mood stabilizators I tried lamotrigine, valproic acid and I take natural lithium orotate. I as well tried some antidepressants. They did not help. Iam tired of trying meds. Still not sure what I will do and how I will live. In which country do you live?Do you have partner?Sorry for so many questions, but Iam interested to see how people with our condition live. Could you imagine to be father for example?
Yeah, it’s been a wild ride, but once I started taking Lurasidone (Latuda) things got much better.
Yes, the diagnosis sunk me into a deep depression until I came to terms with it, then my depression faded away.
I’m in Canada
Nope, I’m single, the vast majority of women I talk with lose interest after I tell them I have schizophrenia. Finding someone with this disease is hard. I haven’t given up but I have low expectations.
I work part time, I live a pretty good life, I am generally happy.
I can imagine it, but I don’t feel like I could afford it and give my kid(s) the life I feel like they deserve.
How long did it take you to accept diagnosis?
Did it take you 20years to find right medicine?
Did you suffer before with other medicine?
You are living in beautiful country. I think you will find partner in the future. You just did not find right person yet. Maybe you should try online dating. Start to first meet person and tell about your diagnosis later on. I have neighbour who is on wheelchair living with parents and he found nice girl he is engaged now. I am so scared I will not find something to make me feel good I mean medicine. Did you change a lot of psychiatrists?I changed a lot and I can not find right person. Recently psychiatrist I went to before she did not want to take me back as I moved to different country, but it was just excuse. I find psychiatrists do not want to have difficult cases. I tried Abilify and had bad reaction to it and psychiatrist did not want to believe me and was pushing on me to take it. That is my experience. Now in Hungary one psychiatrist got angry too I was sick with medicine. Then another psychiatrist does not recommend much, but wanted me to try Vrylar that is cariprazine. I did not try it as people complain of insomnia and after olanzapine that is not good idea. Its really nice and motivating for me to read you are happy with your life. I want to be too.
A long time, I didn’t really come to accept it for about 10 years, but once I did my depression lifted and I quit my antidepressant. When the pdoc told me I had schizophrenia it hit me like a ton of bricks.
I started transitioning from Olanzapine to Lurasidone a few years ago, so I guess you could say it took me about 15 years to find the right medication.
Yeah, I tried abilify and that didn’t work, I became psychotic. I tried haldol, that worked but gave me awful side effects, really bad restless leg syndrome and it made me really dizzy. I couldn’t stand still without feeling like I was going to fall over, even after I quit haldol the dizziness stuck around for months. I had pretty bad withdrawal symptoms from paxil and especially effexor.
Yeah, I like Canada. Well I did an experiment with online dating, I posted about on this website. It didn’t go well. I once waited a month to tell a woman I had schizophrenia and she got mad at me for leading her on and not being honest. If i tell them right away they lose interest. I don’t know what to do. It’s frustrating but I’ve come to the realization not to expect much.
Over the last 17 years I’ve had about 5 different psychiatrists. I’ve been with my current pdoc since 2018.
Yeah, things are not perfect but they are better than they have ever been since I was diagnosed with schizophrenia. I’m sure you can be happy too but it might take some experimentation with medications and time. It took me 15 years to find the right medication. Lurasidone hadn’t even been released when I was first diagnosed so you never know what the future holds.
They started me off at 40mg which I think is insane. The recommended mas dose according to the manufacturer is 20mg.
When I was tapering off I was completely stable until I got down to about 10mg, then I started to become psychotic.
They should never have started me off on such a high dose. My doctor warned me the side effects were life threatening at that dose. I would have been fine at 15mg or 20mg. It makes me mad that they started me at such a a high dose sometimes when I think about it, but at the time I didn’t know anything about these meds so I trusted them.
It will be now 3 years and I still struggle to accept my mental illness. The worst is morning I wake up and realize its true I have this problems. I get anxiety in mornings. I wake up eat and take my supplements and then my anxiety dissapears. If I could solve my mood swings I think things would be better. Now decreasing olanzapine I feel more sensitive, but overaly ok. For me the hard things about acceptance is I do not feel well and then it affects my whole life carrier and so on. I used to be very happy, active and positive girl and I liked who I was that is hard to accept my new self. Would you recommend to me what may help?I think if I felt long term stable it would be better to accept my new life. Not sure what happends now with meds when I decrease olanzapine more. At the moment I visit my family in Slovakia and I feel better I can chat to people here. When Iam in Hungary I do not have any friends there, because I do not speak language and my mental state is worst. How did your schizophrenia started?I was meant to move to my BF in Hungary, I quitted job and suddenly I started to be scared to move. I got pannick attacks, anxiety, stopped sleeping, eating, then I had OCD I was scared I could be dangerous, then racing thoughts, mood swings and paranoia I was scared maybe somebody poison me when I started to have this problems. I was not possible to move to Hungary I had to go to live to my parents as I started to take different medicine. It was so horrible to loose my independance. I moved to Hungary later on, but I do not feel settled there. I kind of lost home where I would be settled and because Iam not mentaly stable I can not feel settled too. Do you have friends?I always had a lot of friends. Since my illness some people positively surprised me some dissapointed me. How do you get on well with family?Before I had good relationship, but when I moved to parents there were problems. I was oversensitive and had arguments. What supplements do you take and how much?
I feel the same way, I’m a guy, but my life was way better before I developed schizophrenia. I was really social, had friends and girlfriends, partied, had a full time job when I wasn’t at school. Things were good. I don’t know what would help with acceptance, just one day I realized this is my life, I have schizophrenia, deal with it. It stopped bothering me as much as it used too.
I use to have anxiety and panic attacks. CBT (Cognitive Behavioural Therapy) really really helped with that. On rare occasions I would take 1mg of lorazepam to help with anxiety. I use to have some paranoia when I was psychotic, I thought I was being mind controlled. I don’t have racing thoughts, mood switngs, OCD and I was never dangerous.
Stability helps, I am able to work a part time job and I am happier than I have ever been since developing this disease. Finding the right medication helped the most. But I still wish I didn’t have schizophrenia.
When I decreased too much I became psychotic. I had to switch to Lurasidone (Latuda) and that made me feel a lot better, I also became much healthier, I lost weight and my blood tests came back perfect.
No, I don’t have any friends or a girlfriend, I haven’t in a long time (years). I can be social and appear totally “normal” but once I tell people I have schizophrenia, I think when they hear the word “schizophrenia” it freaks them out and they would just rather avoid me once they find out. There is a lot of stigma and misinformation about this disease out there and usually when they mention it on the news it is because someone with schizophrenia did something awful. I haven’t told anyone at work and everyone (girls, guys, managers) don’t suspect a thing and I get along fine with all of them, but I know if I told them they would probably treat me differently.
I get along good with my immediate family but they are all I have. My parents are on their 70s so I don’t know how much time I have left with them… When they die I’ll be alone. I have a brother but he doesn’t understand schizophrenia at all, and we don’t share a lot of the same interests or beliefs, but we get a long fine.
I take 300mg l-theanine a day (100mg in the morning and 200mg before bed) and on days that I work I take 160mg of CalmAid (Silexan) before I leave for work. That is it.
Thanks for fast reply. Its horrible to hear people judge schizophrenia so much. I can be your friend. Please do not think you will not have friends. I think people do not know what exactly schizophrenia is, because of many scary movies. Iam also not sure whether what I have is schizophrenia, but I definitely have psychosis when Iam off medicine. I feel strange in reality and I get scary intrusive thoughts. I got a lot of diagnosis psychosis, psychotic decompensation, bipolar. Psychiatrist I went longest to first said psychosis maybe schizophrenia, then she said my diagnosis is not clear. I was hospitalized once psychiatrist assured me its not schizophrenia. I came across just one woman on schizoforum who had same symptoms only she did not have mood swings. She said her diagnosis is psychosis. When you are off medicine what you feel, or see?
Before my illlness I had big carrier I did a lots of interesting jobs and lived in UK, Prague, Wien and Australia. I travelled World. I loved life. I had many friends, loved sports, partied. My longest relationship was 12years. Iam glad I managed all this I had no clue I will become ill. My Father suffered with Depression anxiety since he was 30years old. Doctors could not help him, but he worked. Now he is in retirement he is happy he takes good antidepressant. He enjoys life with my Mum. Propably I got some genes from him.
Does somebody from your family have mental illness?
I have brother too. He is 2 years younger and he has wife and 2 kids. I have sister too she is 24years old and works for Emirates in Dubai as stewardess. I helped her first to go to US to learn English and then I helped her with Emirates too. I spent 2 years helping her, but when my illness started she did not give me support. It was heart breaking. She even said Iam selfish just concentrating on my illness. I lost everything I could not stand on my feet and she could not offer any support. I got support from friends, but it was hard on my friends because of my mood swings. I just cry when I get mood swing, my mind is racing and I do not want to live. So far just lithium orotate helps a bit. Olanzapine was stabilizing, but I still had mood swings. I had 4 jobs full time since illness started. First I could not do. Second I did for 3 months they released us because of corona. I managed it, but I could not handle stress. Last 2 jobs I could not handle stress and I had mood swings. Now I should start new job full time in Hungary working with invoices, but I worry I will not be able to do it. I could imagine maybe to do some less stressy job like selling clothes in shop. I have very good CV, but I can forget it now.
Did you also have this feeling you can not handle stress since having schizophrenia?I can feel my nerves being on thin string. Olanzapine helped a bit, but Iam not sure why is this condition. Iam really scared how I will live. I signed out of health care in Slovakia moving to Hungary now in Hungary I do not know how rulles are. I could imagine to be in Austria. There is good social system. How could you funktion on high dosis of olanzapine? I could handle only 2.5mg and I could still not wake up and felt wasted. When I took abilify I could not stand on my feet only 5mg. We have to believe they will come with new medicines. Iam so scared about these mood swings. I was reading about bipolar woman who tried 34meds. Now visiting my family in Slovakia I did not have mood swing over 1week. I love it. Do you also think of your diagnosis all the time?When my diagnosis came my life fell apart as I wanted to have kids. Now not sure what Mother I would be. As well my BF drinks a lot with friends then behaves not nice and he is introverted, but having short temper. Otherwise he cooks, fix things, but I get anxious when he drinks is angry, or he does not talk. When Iam not well he takes care of me and he did not leave me.
What makes you happy?Is propably good you did not tell at work your problems. I still think you can find partner.
No problem. Yeah, it is horrible but it’s just the way it is. Most people only hear bad things about it.
Thanks Alena! I’ve met some people on this website, but none of them are “my friends” in real life, just online people that I can relate to and that have had some of the same experiences as me, it’s nice to know I am not alone. It seems like no one in real life can understand what I’ve experienced.
I feel some anxiety, I’ve had tactile hallucinations where parts of my body or my whole body feels like it is burning up, it’s not painful, but I didn’t like it. I had visual hallucinations where I saw ghost like images of human heads floating around and shooting out of peoples faces. I also heard voices in my head.
I did under my old medication (Olanzpaine), but I am doing better on my new medication (Lurasidone). I work part time since switching meds. I have to go to work in 20 minutes from now.
I didn’t function much. I slept 12 hours a day and had no energy when I was awake. I didn’t work or do much of anything. Plus my physical health took a huge turn for the worse. I weighed 240lbs and was fat and very unhealthy. I’ve lost over 75lbs and am healthy now.
I think about it sometimes but I don’t obsess over it.
I am pretty happy right now. A girlfriend would be nice but I am kinda use to being single at this point. I’ve met girls but very few accept that I have schizophrenia and those that didn’t care, the relationship went nowhere, we had nothing in common. Maybe one day I will meet someone, but I don’t want to be in a relationship just for the sake of it, I would rather be single than be in a relationship I am not happy with. I’ve been in relationships in the past that I wasn’t really into and I don’t want to do that again.
It must be hard with all symptoms you wrote, but its so cool your meds is working. I can be still your friend even when is online. I am not sure if to try latuda. I was reading people had anxiety, or through up. I think you meet somebody nice now when you are stable. I felt similar about olanzapine as you wrote.
Everyone is different. The experiences of others are just that, other people. I’ve tried meds that didn’t work or had bad side effects that other people say work great for them. Latuda works for some people, but some people have side effects, and for some people it doesn’t work at all. You don’t know until you try.
There is this one woman that shows an interest in me, and she knows I am on Latuda, and she knows Latuda is an antipsychotic, but she doesn’t know I take it for schizophrenia, but she still shows interest every time I talk to her. She knows I am about 15 years older than her. She ticks all the boxes. She is accomplished, intelligent, kind, incredibly beautiful and things are great between us. I’m thinking about asking her out for coffee but I feel like I have nothing to offer her and she is out of my league, she could have any guy she wanted. I’m kinda used to women rejecting me after I tell them I have schizophrenia so that is where my insecurity lies and is making me hesitate.
Do you have any side effects from Latuda?How long do you take it?Does Latuda cause insomnia, or sexual dysfunction?Does it cause anxiety?Does it make you tited, or restless?
Iam not sure what I will do. Its 11 days since I take quarter of Olanzapine. I sleep good maybe 6-7hours. L-theanine helps me. Iam bit more emotional. In the Morning I have anxiety, but Iam much better to wake up as before. Not sure about mood swings yet. Iam taking lithium orotate for it. I did not yet become psychotic.
How did you meet that woman?How it happend you told her about latuda?Ask her out if not girlfriend she could be friend.
My neighbour one who is on wheelchair asked me out, he was even interested I was not, but we became friends. Now he has this other girlfriend-fiance. You should not give up. Now when you are stable just put it in your head you will find partner, believe it and look for it. I believe in power of mind. It happend for me before. Still try online dating. Do not give up. I want to be stable like you, but not sure how to achieve it. Iam just scared all antipsychotics will not be good for me. What antidepresant did you try before?All antidepressants I tried made my psychotic and racing thoughts worse.
It doesn’t cause any side effects FOR ME. But everyone is different, it does cause side effects for other people. I think I started taking it 2018. No insomnia from it, no sexual dysfunction, no anxiety, I am not tired or restless.
I am on 60mg and it has to be taken with 350 calories of food. If I take all 60mg at once I experience akathisia so what I do is take 30mg with breakfast and 30mg with dinner. My pdoc was fine with that. My body can’t handle all 60mg at once, but it can easily handle 30mg twice a day. When I split up my dose like that I have absolutely no side effects at all. In fact since quitting olanzapine and starting Latuda I have lost over 75lbs, my blood tests are all perfect, and my diabetes is much better. I am now pre-diabetic.
She works at the pharmacy I visit and I talk to her every time I am there. She also knows I am on disability so I really don’t know what she sees in me. But when we talk, we talk for a while even though she is busy and I can tell she would like to talk more, but she is busy working, and there are other customers. But we talk and laugh and flirt a little. I’m debating about asking her out but there is never a good time because there are other customers there and her co-workers and I don’t want to put her on the spot in front of them, and if she rejects me I’d rather it be in private, lol
Well it took be 15 years to find a medication that worked and that I am happy with so don’t give up. Lurasidone is considered a much weaker antipsychotic than olanzapine, so theoretically it shouldn’t work as well, but for me it works way better. Also it didn’t even exist when I was first diagnosed, so you never know what the future may hold, don’t give up.
I’ve tried other meds that were no good. Haldol gave me bad side effects and Abilify didn’t work. So you have to just keep trying different meds. There are a lot to choose from.
As for antidepressants I tried Paxil and Effexor. They didn’t really work all that well and the withdrawal symptoms were awful. When I quit I effexor I had very intense “brain zaps” for 3 months, it felt like electricity shooting through my brain. I also had 'body zaps" and felt like crap. Antidepressants helped very little for me.
glad meds are working without side effects. You are lucky. I continue on quarter of pill of olanzapine. I sleep good. I only feel bit more emotional. I visit my family in Slovakia and so far I did not have mood swing that is over week. I like it I can chat to friends and family. In Hungary Iam lonely. My partner is introverted does not talk much. Regarding that woman in pharmacy she for sure knows your diagnosis based on meds you take and how much you take of it. I think you should ask her out. If it will not be GF she could be your friend. You should also not give up on online dating. Now when you are feeling stable you could find partner.
I should start new job in 1 week, but Iam scared I will not be able to do it. Its full time. As well now I do not know what I will do with meds when Iam decreasing. I feel lost. When Iam in Hungary I pay 60eur for 50min online cbt therapy. I had only3 sessions and we did not start therapy properly, because I felt suicidal. Now when I was with friends and family I did not need therapy as I talked enough to everybody. Today I go back to Hungary. We are going to cycle arround lake Balaton. Do you do sports?Being on olanzapine I could not do sports much I felt tired. I did only walking, cycling and swimming. When I was off meds I did some sport every day.