Thanks.
They could be. Iām not too worried, itās just procedures and surgeries that Iām more concerned about. Stuff makes me nauseous to think about.
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Iāve lost both granddads to cancerā¦
They were giving chemos to patients in the 1950s already. You are right treatments are barbaric but I think survival rates have improved steadily and early detection is also vitalā¦
Early detection is definitely important.
In kidney cancer they say itās not too common that its detected early though.
Only found out incidentally through CT scan from stomach pain.
Thatās typically how itās found.
Iām a little curious to see the scans. I thought only 7cm tumors could spread, but itās a matter of where they are. Biggest one for me is a little over 4cm.
Thing is, from that website, apparently, cannabis oil in therapeutic doses over a period of time can actually shrink tumors. Even curing inoperable brain tumors and there are scans to prove it.
Thatās part of the reason Iām not too worried. Still, feels like a chance it might not work, but itās worth a shot.
Not sure when I go to get another scan. But itād be great if from now and to the time I get the scan, that the scans reveal the tumors are shrinking. Then Iād just continue with the oil.
They do have some better treatment options now than they used to, but still itās costly to have to do all that. Especially if new tumors will keep growing.
I still donāt really have a physical reaction to all this that the doctors can see though lol.
āHeās not a whinerā¦ā said the doc at the ER.
āYou donāt talk much do you?ā said the doc at the cancer hospital.
me: [laugh] āNope!ā
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I went to wellbeing (charity support group) today and found out theyāre not going to offer me counseling. They talked to CMHT and got a risk assessment, which says I am not dangerous \o/ yey! But then the idiot CMHT guy told them my condition was too severe so they should not help me. WTF? He just two weeks ago refused me treatment on the NHS because I wasnāt severe enough! Iām going to write him a stiff letter, because Iām British dammit. What a dick.
Hope you will heal Genbu.
I had cancer but surgeon removed it .
Surgery was enough.
It can be scary etc
Hope you have support etc and wish you well.
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Can tell the lack of sleep is getting to meā¦today when I woke up from my nightmare (I had less than 4 hours of sleep, Iāve been staying up as late as possible every night because of my anxiety of getting nightmares) I thought my rat was hanging from her neck in her cage, like her head had gotten stuck in the barsā¦it was just her hammockā¦then a while after that when I was sitting in bed I was looking at my lanyard hanging on the wall and it has a stuffed bear head on it, and as I looked at it I began to control how it was movingā¦and the room became filled with those pink swirling lightsā¦and then I saw the bear smile at me and move its mouth like it was talking. Eventually I snapped out of it and went to go do something but I was just zoning out staring at that for a while. It wasnāt scary, it was more interesting. But I know itās not a good sign if I start to hallucinate the second I zone outā¦ughā¦
Nothing else bad yet though, no paranoia or anything, just exhaustion and seeing weird stuff. So hopefully a good nightās rest will helpā¦itās no wonder I was so crazy in high school since I was chronically sleep deprivedā¦
I hope I do not have std.
I was celibate five years and tested myself just before I met my bf and only thing I had was herpes which I told him about but clean n clear otherwise.
I did not ask him to test himself before we had sex which I should of cause now I have a wierd thing on my pussy that looks like a wart.
I was trusting him that he is faithful n perhaps still do.
If he gave me something then maybe he did not know about it himself and it was from before he met me.
I am concerned if he is homo with his friend or has sexual chemistry with one of his male friends and I think itās disgusting and yes I have a problem with that.
I can see there spirits having sex n also concerned if he gets jiggy with others.
The spirit can cheat even when the body doesnāt.
I think I believe I could have like a romantic soulmate and he goes way out there n beyond with me yet understands my paranoia and helps me there in the grooviest ways.he is romantic and closest to each other than any others.
Places no one else can touch assu h.
I had a vision of me healing my bf beautifully but when I was fragile n surviving he snapped at me.
His male friend seems so jealous of me.
His late seem nosy n spying etc and Iāve. Even concerned if some of his friends if not all are extremist nazis of some type in way I donāt approve of nor am I cool with.
My love n I are so cool with money, faithfulness, energies, nature, others, children and list goes on
Itās what I like to think.
I wonder if I dislike some of his friends n family.
Even if I do I may still have love n care for them cause thatās type of person I may be.
If he was homo of with his dogs or other ā ā ā ā I not cool with I would leave .
I do not have weapons.
I disrespect those who attacked me with invisible weapons when I was unarmed.
It says more about them heyā¦
I could give such people love and care out of charity mainly but they donāt deserve my respect.
What if I canāt stand being around his friends and family and shot homo nezzz them ā¦
Thank fully I have car I can live in and probably even apartment I might be able to live in if I move out but the process would maybe not be easy.
I would have to transport my horse interstate and easiest to sell car and fly back but I donāt own my car well I do but do t.
It was given to me as birthday gift but the papers were never put in my name and are still in woman who gave me card name.
My license n car is one of best thi he to happen to me.
Took so long to get it.
I believe in great romance .
ļø:ghost:
I quit cigarettes 2 years ago. About 3 weeks ago my smoker friend visited me and combined with high life stresses I started smoking again. Iāve noticed that it has already made my circulation worse just in these few weeks, which is scary. So last night I soaked my pack of cigs in water and threw them in the trash. Glad that period of relapse is over with. Switching to just my e-cig for now, but I want to stop the e-cig soon as well.
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Good luck wid da smokin.
I love my bfā¤ļø
Iām so sorry.
I have delusions I e not written about on this forum.
Strange things I d believed as reality to me.
Regarding my bf I want to stick with him for rest of our lives n beyond .
His friends n familyā¦
I have great difficulties n strange. Elegies bout most peopleā¦
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Iām really glad I soaked those cigs in water because sure enough I tried taking a blow dryer to one today. 
Didnāt work, they disintegrated, still cig free. 
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Good for you!
You might have extra money to do something nice with then.
I quit around 11 years ago or so.
I could afford things better and things improved for me when I did.
Always had milk at home after that etc
And even can afford to have my own horse now who was dying n given to me.
Thatās a dream come true to have her.ļø
N car n licence is one of best things to happen to me.
When I enjoyed smoking most I only smoked three a day.
Chain smoking over thirty I was not enjoying them as much.
Thanks @SacredNeigh7 ! Yeah Iāve wasted too much $ in the last few weeks on cigs, glad I caught it before it got crazy.
Glad you are doing well.
It can take s lot of discipline.
So much money can be saved and that can be a delight and joy.
One could spend it on treating self to a massage or saving for a holiday or buying nice nourishing food and being up to date with bills and expenses.
It can be great indeed.
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Iām bored, Iām bored, Iām bored!
So much I donāt want to doā¦yet here I sit.
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Did you see my Kat?
Kat?
no.
Donde esta Kat?
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El gato de SenoritaBuddha esta aqui
(Ahaha autocorrect tried to change āel gatoā to āElectric Gatoradeā) 
http://forum.schizophrenia.com/t/cat-or-dog-i-can-not-decide/82487/44
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Tomorrow, weāll be watching the first of the Star Wars prequels. My co-person hasnāt seen them and feels this prevents her from claiming full cultural literacy.
I saw each of them once, in the theaters, and I can feel a bit of a migraine coming on when I imagine having to watch them again.
Thereās gotta be a way to enjoy these 
any advice appreciated
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Iām away for a few days now, see you all again soon! 