Poke me with a fork I'm done

I can feel the depression beginning. I hate it. I want to just fade away. I want my kids to be happy but me lying around doing nothing affects them. I’m not much fun to be around these days. I need something in my life. Maybe I just need a magical pill. I dunno. I hate me. No one gives a ■■■■ other than a handful of people. I would disappear but my kids need their mom. I can hardly wait til 60. Then I can just walk away from life.

2 Likes

Do you have a Husband or a supportive Ex?
Or is it just you and your kids?

1 Like

Ex tells the kids I’m going to be institutionalized

1 Like

I care about my fellow friends :neutral_face:

1 Like

Hang in there @FatMama.
This shall pass soon enough.

1 Like

Did you ever get the SAD lamp we talked about a few weeks ago? I am going to check into one tomarrow. Winter weather wont be here for a few weeks yet where i m at.

1 Like

I need to talk to my pdoc. I think the lamp may be covered by pharmacare. If not I’ll buy one. I badly need it. My mood is all over the place

2 Likes

Try spending some time outside when it’s sunny. It’s better than the light or supplements.

1 Like

The winter sun in Canada has much less vit d than the summer sun plus our daylight hours are very short in winter. That’s why SAD is prevalent in canada. But yes I need to be out more now before winter!

1 Like

Is this what you are talking about,

This was an relatively inexpensive one I found on amazon…

1 Like

That’s it. It’s on the American site so for me it wouldn’t be worth the shipping probably. I’m going to check.

1 Like

The title was misleading, I was hoping to see a picture of a light socket.

Lol :joy: 151515151515

im sure your kidsare happy just to have you around. plenty of kids have parents who are absentees, or worse abusive. they will come to you when they need affection or advice, don’t assume you always have to be the active one. i bet you have explained the nature of negative symptoms to them, if they understand that and you stress enough that you struggle with this they will know that you care and that you aren’t just being lazy. for the seasonal depression (i live in minnesota so i know what you are dealing with a little bit) consider vitamin d supplementation (its rather cheap) or taking an ssri, antidepressants can help with feelings of guilt caused by depression and they might be exactly what you need to get you out of your funk. just remember that these are powerful medications with many side effects and tough withdrawals.

1 Like

Wellbutrin finally gave me relief last winter. I’m going to ask my pdoc next week If I can start on it already. I hope so. I don’t want to fall in that deep pit.

It looks correct because it says full spectrum daylight. It is the bulb that matters. I mean yes the correct fixture to fit the fluorecent bulb matters too. but we have to make sure the bulb is the same as th SAD lamps, it does not look like it comes with bulb?? I will re-read your post to see.

I have seen those shapes of bulbs before in tiny hydroponic tabletop “greenhouses” people use to grow kitchen herbs. I did not know they were the same? I guess the shape of the bulb may or may not matter?

That is a fluoresent bulb. Even regular shoplight fluoresents produce a wider range of light wavelength colors than led or halogen or incadescent ones.

my point - We need to find the name and specs of a bulb for a SAD lamp and compare it to the bulb that either comes with this lamp, or one that may fit it.

By specs I mean light intensity or brightness along with the kelvin rating and such other things.

But i think you are right about full spectrum from what i remember of the post.

1 Like

Try taking 4000-5000 mg vitamines d3 per day. That’s what my dr recomended to me

1 Like

BINGO!

yup, you nailed it.

It says " 6500 kelvin" and “full spectrum” and “100 watt intensity”. I think we are good to go on the bulb.

I alread have a 6500k CFL, but it is not full spectrum and makes a lot of blue light for my houseplants.

This will be a nice addition! The plants can use it when i am not using it. We can share! lol

very affordable too. I am going to order it soon.probably this week.

Thanks for posting this up for us!

1 Like

If you want a little more umph, you can get a 250 watt halogen bulb, looks like a short, fat test tube and it puts out 10,000 lumens. Used to have 2 of those by me and it was bright as day at anytime

4200 lumens- daylight spectrum
https://www.1000bulbs.com/product/54791/Q-JDD25026120.html

1 Like

yes they sure are bright! They get very hot though dont they? i have only had the lesser intensity lower lumen ones. Plants that like shade love halogen bulbs because they produce one of the highest amounts of the red wavelength of light. Shade plants love red light.

I will give it a try too.