Ill need time to recover i guess

Yeah… Cause I dont do many things still in order to get better. Ive declined a lot with all my mistakes on the past and the illness. My body is already deformed too. Ive spent 17 years between 4 walls, some of you know that. Its not nothing. I am dumber now, far from nice looking and still suffering… I sometimes feel in the mornings something better but it lasts for 5 minutes. But I have to say to myself that its already something. In the past, I knew only the suffering, I havent had a minute of peace before that… Is it strange that the evenings are harder for me still? Maybe the med stops working in the evening(I take my meds at 7 pm)?
But I had problems since child and I never said to anybody that I suffer, strange… My mom even thinks sometimes that I am autistic and not schizophrenic…
Please, tell me that I can get a better quality of life one day cause in the evenings I am still desperate… Maybe it really takes sometimes a lot more time on the meds??? I never been really delusional, no hallucinations, no delusions of grandeur… I have paranoia instead, I am really closed for everything, intellectual and emotional decline etc etc…
Lots of kisses people :slight_smile:
P.S. I just saw the movie about Snowden at my house now, I made my efforts to catch the movie, it was a good movie :slight_smile:

Of course you’ll have better days. It is possible. A lot of positivity and effort are necessary though.

Ok, thanks @brugluiz. But I hate that I have those desperate moments every day. My pdoc said to me that sometimes meds take years to have results but they worked much faster for my ill friends. Does this show that maybe I have some another illness you think? Or maybe, I am not from the lucky schizophrenics…

1 Like

I never heard that meds take years to work. I thought meds worked in months for the positive symptoms. For the negative symptoms, they generally don’t work.

my pdoc believed that my Zyprexa should give me some good mood. Self confidence too. But yes, I guess I have a lot of negative symptoms like irritability,anger, depression. Without my meds I am in my bed stopping eating and taking personally what is said on the tv. The Zyprexa put me on my feet with less paranoia but I still wait for the good mood. I felt something today for 5 minutes again but it was too short, yes. Its been a year and two months that I am on Zyprexa and Depakote. In fact I live a lot like a nobody still, i am always really low etc etc. oh and yes, i didn’t have positive emotions for years, i dont know if you can imagine what it is to be like this for so long…

1 Like

it took me years to reach where I am now. I’m not 100% but I am doing better. I have tried multiple different kinds of meds including risperdone three times. please don’t give up.

2 Likes

:smiley: cbbrown, ok, ill try not to do something to myself. I gave to the psychiatry 7 years of my life. I guess brugluiz cant understand this cause i know already how are the ‘‘positive’’ schizophrenics… They dont know what is to be prisoned in your house by your own for 17 years… I dont go out cause i am too sad or i lack the energy, sometimes i drag my feet to the ground literally… But my doc said to stick with this trt, the only one who helps a bit till now without a lot of side effects… Sorry to be harsch but i am fed up by all these years, it still happens to me to look in the past and in the future too wow…

1 Like

What are “positive” schizophrenics?

I guess those with positive symptoms?.. And without depression, anger etc etc

I have positive symptoms but meds control them. I have negative symptoms too, but I believe in neuroplasticity, so I can change things with time and effort.

yeah, me too i started to believe in neuroplasticity. i want to live and to be kinder already. You know, i just have one friend, ill too and she is not as depressed as me so she hurted me in the past, that’s why i talk about the positive schizophrenics… But me, i hurted her too i think… Its time to be happy already or healthier or whatever but i just sit here every night alone and my head will explode by pain cause i think too much about stupidities… lets say that i guess that without meds its even worse, i was feeling my brain in my head before…

1 Like

a lot of things are unfrair youll say, isn’t it? Me and my 17 years behind me where i was just in hell, that’s all…

pfff, i want to edit this post. i was mean now, sorry if i offended somebody but i am so ■■■■■■■ depressed sometimes still

I have positive, negative and cognitive symptoms. I have dealt with it for 7-8 years. I hate it. but I know it will hurt people that I care about if I go back to self harming because of anger or depression sometimes even anxiety.

yeah, you are right cbbrown, me too i hurt my people…

1 Like

If I didn’t have my friend who call me always and take me out to the bed I could be closed in my house or my family houses too. I have noticeable cognitive and negative symptoms and feel my life lost too sometimes. I had never imagine I could get like this.

When I was in my 20’s and 30’s, I was terribly depressed and suicidal. Suicide was all I ever thought about, night and day, for years and years. It’s a miracle I never completed it. But, I was always active. I never laid around in bed and did nothing. I always went to work, and after work I went out and played and socialized. In fact, the only times I felt good was when I was at work. In my late 30’s, I moved from Phoenix, AZ to Omaha, NE and it was then that the nature of my illness changed. The depression and suicidal ideation disappeared and I became more psychotic, paranoid and delusional. I don’t know the reasons for this and I’ve never asked my pdoc. I probably should. Could be the difference in climate, who knows?