I was diagnosed with chronic paranoid schizophrenia. Recently they think I was misdiagnosed and changed it to bipolar unspecified and adhd but it makes little sense. I feel it was a backlash for applying to disability and I was told there’s nothing wrong with me and even the genetics for muscular dystrophy hadn’t expressed themselves. I’m back on a week of steadily taking Abilify 15mgs at night and Strattera 25mgs in the morning. I stopped taking the medication after the insurance wouldn’t pay for Abilify for a month and then the doctor lowered the dose. When I ask to raise the dose he ignores me. He has ordered blood tests for diabetes and I have now had three blood tests and an ekg that shows tachardia and a blood sugar content of 150 since I’ve been drinking energy drinks almost every day. I found that being off medication made me a lot different and sad and apathetic/vacant and completely immersed in magical thinking.
But recently I’m starting to think I have to have schizophrenia. My mom has it severely. I don’t like it being downplayed as if ignoring that it affects me somehow negates the issue. It also downplays the times i am managing better. I don’t know why they labeled me bipolar. I’ve never had severe depression or mood swings and its sort of driving me crazy how I finally accept the diagnosis after ten years and its being changed. I have no support financially and I’m denied any sort of gov.assistance I get burnt out on jobs and I’m told I’m discriminated against for being “too slow” sometimes even though I was over-working. I’m starting to get angry and hurt. At least on medication I can feel emotions. But what they don’t realize is that it’s the crazyness that’s messing with me. My moods aren’t disturbed. It’s hurtful. I’m just hurting hurting hurting and it doesn’t stop.
I feel like giving up and I feel like that is what I’m supposed to do.
You have quite a different problem than most of us have experienced, in that you think you are sz and most of us thought we weren’t and denied it , quit are meds and ended up back in the phyc ward. I think I would try a new pdoc. If the meds help you feel normal I don’t think the label you have should keep you from getting what you need. I couldn’t emagine anyone abusing a.p. meds,. They suck. But on the other hand speaking for myself I couldn’t be off my meds for a few weeks before I’d end up in the ER. So if you are sz I don’t see how you went a year with out meds. Hope you find a solution.
Thanks for the response. No you don’t abuse AP meds. But I have gone for awhile without them. I think they are better for treating depression and moods; so that explains the diagnosis of Bipolar. I read that Bipolar when you have high energy can look like Schizophrenia but now people know the difference. I like my pdoc because he doesn’t pill push or say something he doesn’t believe. He said I never had schizophrenia and that I have had depression and mood issues. He was right and he’s very thorough with his diagnosis technique. I was re-evaluated and took a battery test where they ask questions, test IQ and everything. I have an average IQ and it was suggested I had anxiety related spaciness and bipolar It also said that the treatment had been working well and had been successful so that I had a good outlook.
It seems the importance is the amount of time you are functioning well. I based my focus on: for one straight year I did not have unstable thoughts, moods, or hallucinations. That time I was diagnosed with schizoaffective and put on Latuda which made me feel physically ill. I switched to a new doctor and system; but the insurance denied paying for abilify for a few months which forced me to build up more coping mechanisms (healthy ones) and coping skills (therapy, visualization, reading and writing). Now I am back on Abilify and have taken it regularly for one month. It increased my sensitivity however did not induce hallucinations and improved my mood and concentration. This is why Abilify is now prescribed for Bipolar1, Autism, and other mental health issues. It has a cognitive enhancing factor which bypasses other medications. It also reversed my psychosis over time. It took ten years until I was able to reap the benefit of being on Abilify regularly. I take a lower dose now and it is the most effective for my low mood and low affect. It’s hard to describe what group my mental illness is under. It feels like mild autism but I was re-evaluated and told I have Bipolar1 and concentration issues with a good prognosis and have made steady recovery.
I’m not. Being a year off meds was intense. I began to depersonalize. It was due to stress and insurance issues that I couldn’t take the medication. I’ve been taking the medication and worked things out after that.
No you don’t abuse AP meds. But I have gone for awhile without them. I think they are better for treating depression and moods; so that explains the diagnosis of Bipolar. I read that Bipolar when you have high energy can look like Schizophrenia but now people know the difference. I like my pdoc because he doesn’t pill push or say something he doesn’t believe. He said I never had schizophrenia and that I have had depression and mood issues. He was right and he’s very thorough with his diagnosis technique. I was re-evaluated and took a battery test where they ask questions, test IQ and everything. I have an average IQ and it was suggested I had anxiety related spaciness and bipolar It also said that the treatment had been working well and had been successful so that I had a good outlook.