I think I work too hard sometimes- risk of burnout

I realized that I was productive for 13 hours yesterday…and was changing meds going through that hell the rest of the week…then I usually take Fridays as my “tend to tedious bull” day, like leg day and phone calls and bills and the like, or like last semester, lab meetings, and I have been dealing with phone calls while there is something wrong with my phone and working with the AT&T people to fix it, and then I was told that I would get a call before 7pm, then I picked up a textbook, then I was like “No, going to burn out.”

I usually gave myself friday afternoons and evenings off everything, I think I need to learn to not be a machine that just does things with incredible reliability…it is a little inhuman…that and how I just…don’t know how to take it easy…not actually healthy. Balanced is healthy. I mean it gets awards and stuff, I look up at the awards I have all over the wall above my desk sometimes, and I realize that they are probably due to the fact that I am always reading and writing.

It’s not even a matter of doing something else, I do things like “oh I don’t feel like reading this book, I will read these articles instead”…like"dude, you’re still working."

This is an odd problem- I think I am a “workaholic.” My normal friends call me an “over-achiever”, but my competitive friends don’t. They perform like I do, so it wouldn’t make sense.

I think I should try not reading or writing, but even being on here is reading and writing…

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Well, if you feel you might burn out, then take it easy. You know yourself best.

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Wow, you are a such hard worker. Rest is very important and you need it. Our brain can’t do long time job.

You need to stop like one day a week and do absolutely nothing, no work out, no going to meetings, nothing. That habit of considering not studying doing nothing is what leads to burn out.

You’re trading your life for achievements. When you’re on your deathbed, do you think you will regret not having achieved more academically? Or will you regret more that you didn’t have time for love, for your friends and for your family? I’m not saying you’re making the wrong decisions, but most people when they’re dying do not regret that they didn’t work more. Life is not really about success and social status.

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That is a good point. It is just that my studies are no longer just researcher ego-stroking, I am in a program that is for clinicians, not theorists. My scholarship will be used on people. It is serious.

I have been in a couple of sessions with a shrink who graduated from my program, and he thinks I may be better off working in a forensic setting- that is good and bad- they enjoy good pay and benefits (federal job) but their level of expertise is serious as can be. It is not really about an empathic bond in forensics. It is about getting the stuff straight. Getting criminals figured out. Being correct or else ruining a life which will have a ripple effect and taint other lives. It is heavy ■■■■ and I am having to mull it over.

But yes- I need to take better care of myself in regards to learning to take it easy. I actually took a bath for the first time since I was a kid last night. I then found myself studying psychopathy, watching videos of Prof. James Fallon, a neuroscientist who is also a benign psychopath, and taking notes…then watched a show about terrorists before going to bed…lol I just think differently. I am suspect and actually was dx’d with Aspergers by one shrink.

but yes- I need to learn to take time to not be so hard on myself. People from the backgrounds I am from were all about being hard on yourself, only to get old and then become the opposite. I may just be still in a hyperaroused state from what undergrad was like- it was hell. I am showing signs of becoming more normal, it doesnt happen overnight, though.

I had to trade my life for achievements, which are lining the wall in front of me, for what I am enjoying right now. It was temporary and was just a means to an end. I need to get back into normal life. It was do or die, graduate and earn every honor I could and get into a program prepared to finish it, or work at Starbucks. It was shrink or barista.

it is sad, really. I sort of gave up a little humanity.

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That’s not always a bad thing when you stop and think of how so many humans treat each other. Taking it easier sounds like a plan. I suggest a purring cat and a hot cup of tea. :wink:

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I suggest a dog :wink:

Sorry this is sorta random, but I just saw this iPhone commercial on TV and it made me smile

my advice mortimermouse, is to lie down, take a nap and when you wake up do what you feel like doing.

hugs, judy

You probably know what is not going to burn you out. I think I’ve given myself burnout a couple of times as well. Not so much the last couple of years as everything after college seems like I’m slacking. Only suggestion is that if you ever feel psychosis coming tend to that immediately. You already know that so yeah best of luck.

I’ve been taking normal hours of working since then…I spend 8-10 hours a day learning…which is better than 11-13. Baby steps.

Mostly I just am addicted to scholastic stuff and also can’t afford to go on vacations. Haven’t been on one since I was 18 for a high school class trip.

I do my best to use what I gather as I study…that’s the idea after all.

If its easy for you keep it up then keep it up. Thats a nice vice to have the inability to not be productive. I can tell from your post that you tend to like to go above and beyond on everything. Thats a good personality trait to have, people like that are the ones who prescribe and even invent the medications you mentioned taking. You have the potential to give alot to the world, you have that power, its up to you what you decide to do with that talent.

Have you tried meditating or yoga? With your athleticism and will power you’d make an excellent yogi.

i was discussing this with my volunteer co-ordinator today at the review, i was worried that i was trying to take on too much, i didnt feel like i was doing much and i wanted to achieve more but its at the risk of my mental health and i cant afford that,

i have been doing a couple of hours on a Monday morning and i will be doing a couple more during the week but i was really keen to get my foot on the ladder and try some proper paid work as maybe a care assistant, i have been looking up jobs online a lot again and i went to see a careers adviser a couple of times and she said that i have enough qualifications to become a care assistant or a support worker just now so i got excited about that but i have been mulling it over and what i am going to do is just look at my options when i see the ips specialist and go from there,

i think about it all the time though ‘what can i do’ what will i do’ how can i do it’ can i do it? the last one is usually the toughest to answer though thats why i got to be careful, dont want this pack of cards to fall down and i got to play with a full deck as well lol

I applied to volunteer at a hospital- I have three weeks before school starts and am dying for work. I mean it is bad. Like accidentally reading 50 pages of meds over and over and watching lectures and taking notes…I need to do something more hand-on and applied rather than just study in this room…as good as I am at it.

I am just waiting to hear back about the volunteer work. You would think they would look at my schooling and be like “please, work for free.” I dunno.

they might still want to start you off slow just until you get use to it thats what they are doing with me anyway and i’m glad bc i dont think i could have handled 15/20 clients straight away so they have been building me up, its just on the phones but its pretty hard and now they are giving me more to do with an admin role as well,

i see it as a stepping stone to work and maybe in the future an addition to it as well bc i dont think i will be able to do full time or stop benefits anytime soon