I made a huge mistake

Just to give a little background, I grew up on the east coast with just my nuclear family. They all either moved back to the west coast or the Midwest to be with their respective families (my parents are separated). I decided I would stay and finish school on the east coast. Well just recently I made a pretty bad suicide attempt so my family took me to the Midwest for inpatient treatment. I was only there for 10 days, but stayed in the state for an additional 6 months to help with my recovery. I lived with family and I didn’t feel depressed or symptomatic. But even so, the entire time I was there I couldn’t wait to get back to the east coast. Well my family pulled together and made it happen which I am forever grateful to them for. But now that I am back I feel like I made a huge mistake. I came back to a boyfriend that doesn’t love me, friends who are consumed with their own lives, and a job that I hate going to. I’ve only been back a week and I feel like should be going back to the Midwest where people actually care about me. The only thing is I’ve registered for classes here and they start tomorrow. And my mom spent over 1k to get my car transported back here. I don’t want to tell her I want to come back so soon, she’ll have wasted that money. I feel SOOO depressed here and there’s so much going on. I’m in over my head and I don’t know what to do.

take a deep breath. boyfriends come and go. don’t let how he feels about you sabotage your status. there’s plenty of good guys out there. it prolly seems like your friends are out of tune because they are. you’ve been gone for a while. once you guys start hanging out again you’ll feel like part of the group again. it’s good you have family in the midwest that cares for you but even more important you are fending for yourself in the east coast. your accomplishing so much. when you start to dig into your classes you’ll have something to brag to them about and you won’t miss them so much. i hope you feel better soon!!

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This is really uplifting, thank you Johnny5. I’m feeling so panicked about the whole situation that sometimes I forget to breathe.

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I agree with what @johnny5 said and also Brittany, it’s only been a week and it’s gonna take some time adjusting back , I’d say don’t try to go back or anything until you’ve given urself time to get comfortable and get back into a routine there. Best of luck :slight_smile:

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You’re totally right, I haven’t even started classes yet. Who’s to say I won’t love them.

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Restarting your life after a major episode is incredibly difficult. But you are stronger now. It will take time, but eventually, you’ll feel like this is your life again. It takes a lot of courage to go back to school and your friends. It is a hard thing to transition back. But give it time. You had six months away, but it will probably only take one month to get back in the swing of things.

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Just remember that this doesn’t have to be final. Things can change. It’s when you start feeling like there is no way out that you are the greatest danger to yourself. Since you committed yourself to classes this semester you might want to follow through on that. Keep in mind what alternatives you have. Is there a good school in the Midwest? Can you transfer your credits there? Look for alternatives where you are now. Do you have choices in who you accept as friends? Maybe things will turn out okay where you are living now.

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What greater thing is good mental health compared to a pocketful of dollars that do you no good.

Sorry, but I have to say the biggest mistake would be to stay stuck in a place you aren’t happy, the results could be tragic- for you and your family.

If your family knows you feel you made a mistake going back to where you’re miserable, tell them, and don’t wait to tell them until your mental health declines so far it takes more time and money to get you back than it was to get you there.

Money is not as valuable as a human being you love, believe me, I’d have given every penny to have my 25 year old nephew alive today.
I’m sure your family is worried about you going back to where the problems became too much for you, and I’d bet they’d welcome you back without question just to have you happy and with them.

What are you waiting for? Give them a call today.

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I’m really hoping things go back to normal soon, thank you. I’m not very patient with these things, I really should be.

I’ve begun making plans to move back once I get my degree. That way I won’t have to worry about credits transferring to the school where my family lives. Hopefully once I go back, I’ll be able to make friends at school. I have a hard time with that, but I’m optimistic. Maybe things will turn out for the better here but I have a feeling I’ll return to the Midwest sooner than later, I just wish I didn’t have to come back to realize it.

Wow, this made me cry. You’re so right. I know my family would see it this way too. Especially my mom. It brings tears to my eyes to know she would feel the same. I kind of feel like this message came directly from her. I’ll call her when it’s not so late tomorrow. I’m sure she will be happy. Thanks @Csummers, this really opened my eyes. Seriously.

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I kind of feel like she was talking through me…I cried too while writing it, now I know why.
Thanks for reading my post, it rings of truth, and good luck to you too, you’re lucky to have such a caring family, and they’re lucky to have you too.

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I’m used to people ignoring me so it wouldn’t bother too much. Education is important. What are you getting your degree in?(don’t know if I asked before). Although I can understand how you miss your family. When I was in washington d.c I missed my family pretty much everyday. Which is strange because it was more than when I was away from home in the military. If you need to do things the sensible way and depart once you can transfer to a school in the midwest. Of course by then I don’t know how much you would still want to.

Maybe she was… Here comes the waterworks. This really meant a lot. I am so lucky to have people like you as well as my family. Thank you again💜

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This just tells me the huge mistake you’d be making would be if you stayed there.
Come back to where you belong…and the sooner, the better for us all. :blush:

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Right now I’m just working on a general education degree with a focus on psychology. My plan is to hurry up and get the degree then transfer. There will be no messy credit transfers that way. A degree is a degree no matter where you are. I doubt my mind will change, I’m pretty miserable here.

Well if you really want to move back there is no problem with that just try to keep your future in mind. That’s the only reason why I mentioned making sure to end the semester and transfer that way you don’t miss a semester. Another thing I missed is midwest traffic. Washington d.c. traffic was awful.

Your family will be there for you when and if you decide to go home. But your in a situation that might not always be affordable to get back into. I’d stick it out as long as possible could end up being a positive thing.

You might just be homesick. If you can try toughing it out for a year and see how you feel after that. You may even meet a new boyfriend. I just think that you are lost because your boyfriend doesn’t care. I would not even worry about a boyfriend until you are out of college because you could get the wrong one.

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