I think since I never thought I would live this long it is helping me be happy. 5 years ago I didn’t care about my health, I didn’t care about my life…I cared about my life…but I didn’t care if I would have died.
Now that I am not suicidal, and every day seems to exceed my expectations of what I thought life would bring for me, I will be able to appreciate every day as a gift. I told my therapist I had this thought for the first time and she said if you treat every day like a gift you will be happy.
I think by having such low expectations for my life, every day that goes by I am exceeding what I thought I would amount to. This makes me happy. Of course a month ago when I was severely depressed there was no hope. But by fixing my meds, it has lead to insights like this.
Can anyone relate?