Does anyone else think their therapist is plotting against them?

I live in America. it was psych meds. and it was totally unethical what they were doing to me, but it was legal.

I’m not sure honestly. But yeah I’m working with my therapist on my trauma but it’s a very slow process cause my trauma stems from therapy.

Definitely not in food cause that definitely is hitting a bad memory. And I’m trying to work on it

Do you remember what drugs you’ve taken? I’d be curious to know what they tried before they started to experiment and if any of the experimental drugs are well known today

It’s illegal to give children experimental meds. Are you sure that’s what happened? How old were you? Maybe you’re remembering it wrong.

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I have trust issues with my mental health nurse and the psychiatrists in my mental health team. I feel like they hypnotise me, put thoughts into my head so I say it and then they judge me for saying it.
Sometimes I disassociate and go mute in the appointments which is embarrassing and a bit scary.
I also think they have bad intentions and are trying to trick me.

But I will be straight with my nurse tomorrow and tell her this. I’m nervous though.

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Well actually the drugs I was on were for adhd cause I was horribly misdiagnosed for the first 15 years of my life cause my doc was too dumb to connect the dots. But only one of the drugs made it to market that I was on. So yeah.

Definitely not remembering it wrong. I have records and other people that remember it.

I dissociate and go mute sometimes too so I understand how scary that can be but I wish you luck with talking about it I hope it works well for you!

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Oh and it started when I was 8

So can I get some advice please??

Be honest with your therapist. Just say something like “I don’t trust you” or “I have reason to believe you’re plotting against me”. See how she handles it.

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That’s a little direct but I guess I could play it off as a joke if the reaction is bad. Thank you :slight_smile:

I only used a therapist once and became paranoid that he was going to admit me to the psych ward so I just dropped him. Then my psychiatrist who was friends and working with him did exactly that. I don’t do therapists, but my wife has one and likes her a lot.

It takes a lot for me to go to therapy I expect every time I go in I’m gonna end up getting locked up but I keep going cause honestly I’m trying to get over my trauma a bit. But what do you do instead of therapy?

What would be so bad about being locked up? If they deem that that’s what you need, then maybe it’s for the best. I know a lot of people have very negative views on mental hospitals, but if you lose the notion that the staff are against you and that you don’t want to be there, and instead try to make the best of it and use the time there to get better, it can be a quite rewarding experience.

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Could you go in with a family member or good friend whom you completely trust? That might ease your tension at appointments…

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One time I was a little surprised and kind of shocked by the hostility my therapist showed me when he put me back in the hospital. I was thinking, “Hey, aren’t you supposed to be on my side?”

Getting locked up would be terrible cause then I’ll have no freedom while getting watched 24/7 all while people try to force drugs on me. Not to mention the stigma on the outside that I’d receive from literally everyone I know. And the fact that I’d honestly rather kill myself than get locked up Hell no. Hospitals are the opposite of therapeutic. And I’m more than just some ■■■■■■■ psycho but that’s all they’ll think of me as/ treat me like. So in conclusion no I hate hospitals I refuse to go.

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I don’t have anyone I trust like that unfortunately but thank you