Couple of things here: if it is terrible without zyprexa and depakote, you are feeling improvement from your meds.
But also, if the main issue is borderline (or any other personality disorder), the main source of relief for you is going to be therapy and forcing yourself to change your habits. Meds will not solve all your problems, even if they do provide some necessary relief to you.
Personality disorders require a good deal of effort on your part to challenge the destructive patterns you fall into. Waiting for meds to fix the issues just means you'll keep feeling how you're feeling.